Dorky bike gifts from clueless people

[jobob]

Stylin' !

[lph]

I guess MAYBE... just maybe... Julia Roberts could get away with wearing those, in Pretty Woman.

And then again, maybe not

Interesting thread though, touches on a whole lot of the angst around gift-giving and -receiving, which as somebody astutely pointed out, is not about the gift, but about the relationship to the giftgiver.

My mother has lived abroad in winter for many years, and has in general displayed an enormous lack of interest in the family. Several Christmases running she got a friend of hers here to buy me a Christmas present - a huge box of chocolates of the most generic brand available. Sure, she meant well, sure, the chocolates tasted good, but still - I was sad and pissed off every year by the complete lack of thought that went into it. It's the kind of gift you buy the postman.

I finally piped up about it, and now we just exchange e-cards. Which is so much better, as we actually exchange some good wishes and real thoughts...

[Tri Girl]

Now I feel guilty because I think I'm the one you're referring to when you say you receive gifts that have little or no meaning. I'm the crappy gift giver... but I try, I really do.

Here's why
I admit one thing: I HATE buying people gifts. Not because I'm poor or because I don't like giving to others, or because I don't truly know and love the people I buy for, but because I never feel like the gift I give will be good enough. Even when buying gifts from the Salvation Army Christmas tree for needy children that I'll never meet- I have the hardest time picking things out that I think people will like (and these are people I've never met- it's even harder to "please" the people I know and love). And you can say, "I'm sure they'll love it because it's the thought that counts", but from these discussions, sometimes they don't and they hate it.

I've never been the person who says "I know the perfect gift for so and so" or been in a store and said "so and so would love that." It's so hard for me to think of meaningful gifts for people, so often I'm the one who sends the crappy box tower or buys the cheesy gift that somewhat goes with things someone likes (like the basket- seriously- that basket could've been from me). Shopping is torture for me. Instead of getting the fuzzy "I'm doing something good" feeling, I'm stressed trying to find something, anything, that they'll remotely like. I wish I could be like RM and remember the time her SIL took pictures of the eggplant she grew and got her vintage seeds. That's awesome! I sooooo wish I could be like that. I've tried to jot things down about the people I love, but I can just never find things that are "perfect" or sentimental or meaningful. I truly try... really...

So, when you get a crappy gift from someone you love, please be kind. Perhaps they're a terrible shopper with no clue what to buy you (like me). I try, I really do. I spend 2 months thinking of gifts for Christmas and always wind up with something "cruddy" for people.
Lately I've started painting for people. They're not paintings worth anything, but at least I try to pick scenes they might like. But even then, art is truly in the eye of the beholder, and I might love it, but they might think "where am I going to hang this crap?"

I'd rather just never exchange gifts....it's too stressful, and has truly taken the fun out of Christmas for me as an adult.
Ok- I'm ready for everyone to pounce on me. I can take it...


by the way- those shorts are HIDEOUS! I wonder if I can get them for my cycling friend... just kidding.

[Bikingmomof3]

(((((Tri Girl))))) It truly is, IMO, the thought that counts. If you saw my house you would see how eclectic it is. Mainly due to many gifts from friends I treasure and who thought enough of me to send me a gift. Ask X and Kit about my Santa riding a crow. I love it. A friend made it with her hands and it has a special place in my heart. For what it is worth, I love homemade gifts and I imagine your paintings will be well received.

[lph]

Lately I've started painting for people. They're not paintings worth anything, but at least I try to pick scenes they might like.

Oh Tri Girl, you're nothing like what I meant! I don't mind "crappy" (i.e. inappropriate, useless, not-my-type-of-thing) presents, if they come from someone who truly doesn't know me that well, or who obviously means well but just has different taste. I get presents like that all the time, from neighbours, or my mother-in-law or whatever, and they just make me smile. In fact gifts like these are sometimes the ones that make most happy, because they turn up out of the blue from someone unexpected :-)

Honest - if my mother had made me anything, ever, by hand, I would treasure it even if it were pink earwarmers with little gold piglets on...

And fwiw, I was brought up (by her...) to never, ever criticize a gift, so it took me years to pipe up that I would in fact just prefer a nice card.

[jobob]

I'd rather just never exchange gifts....it's too stressful, and has truly taken the fun out of Christmas for me as an adult.
Ok- I'm ready for everyone to pounce on me. I can take it...

You kidding?!? Leebob's and my families have declared a moratorium on Christmas gifts, for which I am eternally grateful. We don't do Christmas gifts for adults, plain and simple. And our Christmas is blissfully stress-free.

[KnottedYet]

You kidding?!? Leebob's and my families have declared a moratorium on Christmas gifts, for which I am eternally grateful. We don't do Christmas gifts for adults, plain and simple. And our Christmas is blissfully stress-free.

that sounds PERFECT! Presents for kids, and really that's what Christmas presents started out as in the first place.

when did it turn into big screen TV's and XBoxes and "bigger and better" expensive shtuff like that?

Oh, and food. gotta have the food. Food is good. And parties. With food.

[jobob]

Oh, and food. gotta have the food. Food is good. And parties. With food.

Oh, but of course !

[Tri Girl]

You kidding?!? Leebob's and my families have declared a moratorium on Christmas gifts, for which I am eternally grateful. We don't do Christmas gifts for adults, plain and simple. And our Christmas is blissfully stress-free.

I love that idea. Actually, it's what our families decided to do this year. We figure that as adults when we want something, we get it. It's not like when you were a kid and you didn't earn money and actually had to "depend" on the kindness of others to get you what you wanted. When we want something, we buy it- so it seems silly to get gifts anyway.

Plus, I like what you said about the kids getting gifts. That's all the fun of Christmas anyway- the excitement on their faces, and the thrill when they get something they really, really wanted.

All my friends think I'm scroog-y this time of year, and it's not that (I like to think I'm a giving, caring person), but shopping for friends/family just stresses me out...


and Mimitabby- I'm with you. I'd bid on them if they weren't so crazy expensive. Really, who's going to give up $60+ for THOSE shorts. I'd wear them as a prank on our annual Christmas light ride if they were cheap- it would make everyone laugh so hard they'd be crashing left and right.