Lost the Love - will it come back?

[SouthernBelle]

After reading your post, I thought of several things, most of which have already been posted. But the primary thing is that your riding seems to be about your husband and not about what you enjoy. I would have resented the hand-me-down bike no end.

I say take the winter off from anything pedally. Find something else to do at the gym. Then reassess next spring. If you start looking at new bikes wishfully, then you might end up riding because you love it, and not because your DH does.

[Nokomis]

Thank you all so very much! Honestly, I didn't expect so much support in needing to walk away from the bike - but you're absolutely right!

I really shouldn't have read all this from work - trying really hard not to tear up, but again, from my heart ~ thank you.

[PinkBike]

whoa, you ladies have really got me thinking.
i love to ride and love to get better and faster.
DH and i ride together all the time, but i'm the one who is faster and pushes harder.
we ride together every day when we commute, and we stay together on group rides, but in races i always jump out and try to get a good time.
so, now i'm thinking i should maybe stick with him in the races so it's more fun for him. on our first century ride, we stayed together the whole way and we shared drafting, and we both had a great time. but there was no clock ticking, either. so, should i stay with him and have a shared experience? or do i follow my body that's just poised to attack from the start? he's really proud of me when i post a good time, but then again maybe he feels bad when he's stranded back in the pack alone. i just dunno............
what to do, what to do??

[SouthernBelle]

whoa, you ladies have really got me thinking.
i love to ride and love to get better and faster.
DH and i ride together all the time, but i'm the one who is faster and pushes harder.
we ride together every day when we commute, and we stay together on group rides, but in races i always jump out and try to get a good time.
so, now i'm thinking i should maybe stick with him in the races so it's more fun for him. on our first century ride, we stayed together the whole way and we shared drafting, and we both had a great time. but there was no clock ticking, either. so, should i stay with him and have a shared experience? or do i follow my body that's just poised to attack from the start? he's really proud of me when i post a good time, but then again maybe he feels bad when he's stranded back in the pack alone. i just dunno............
what to do, what to do??

Ask him. He may feel like he is holding you back which won't make him love it. You may be different style riders. Some of us are racer girls. Some of us are long distance riders. Some of us meander. Each of you just need to be what you are. He may like riding on his own some.

[MomOnBike]

OK, maybe it's not the thing to say here, but the world will not stop spinning if you give up the bike for good.

Listen to yourself if you want to take a break - or quit entirely - and give yourself permission to just walk away. Sell the bike if you need the cash.

There will always be bikes, if you decide later you want to ride again, then give yourself permission to do it - and then do so on your own terms.

[Xrayted]

What mom said!