Thread Drift

[shootingstar]

I relate to both TE forumites who are part of a couple and those who live alone 'cause:

we maintain 2 homes in 2 provinces. My partner isn't always living in the same city where I work full-time. We spend time together in each home city location for chunks of the year which gets compounded by my limited vacation time due to a full-time job. Hence, my motivation to form more deeper friendships in my job-oriented city is less. After working for several employers in my career, my incentive to create personal friendships via other employees, dropped off a long time ago. The only local good friend is someone who works for the same employer but she is in a totally different dept. where our work roles would never cross. (Thank goodness!) Instead she and I met initially...in the employee collective bike cage. A friendship can begin in a collective bike cage, not during a bike ride.

As a couple for last 24 yrs., dearie and I just haven't joined up group rides often each year. We seem to go on one...um...1-2 times per year, if that. He and I are friendly introverts. He is well-known in the Vancouver area cycling advocacy circles and has many cycling advocacy contacts in the city and across British Columbia. But strangely, he very rarely goes cycling with these folks on his own personal trips and seldom goes out strictly just for a personal coffee/drink with such friends if there isn't some cycling matter he wants to chat up. Personally I find it abit odd, but I love dearie for being a friendly outlier.

I'm the one that still maintains some contact with long-time friends across Canada...even if they can't be immediately in the same city to help me. He is not like that all. But he is entirely content with this. Literally a friendly hermit but saves his personal "socializing" time for myself, his children and grandchildren.

But true, how helpful it is to have a local trustworthy friend when one is grieving, sick or injured.