Dear So and So

[Selkie]

Dear coworker:

I really wish you wouldn't wear headphones when you eat lunch, because the sounds you're making are making me want to vomit. STOP BEING SO GROSS!! CHEW WITH YOUR MOUTH CLOSED!!

Sincerely,
not your mother

LOL. Unfortunately, it probably wouldn't matter if the audible chewer/slurper took off the headphones! I can't abide by rude eaters, either. They always seem to choose crunchy foods, don't they?