Dear boyfriend:
I get that you've been riding longer than I have. However, just because you have never experienced these problems does not mean that I'm "doing it wrong" or that "it's supposed to be like that and [I'm] not used to it yet." You lack a few of the parts involved, for one thing. I know my body better than you do, thanks very much.
I think your "helpful adjustments" have created more problems than they've solved. I'll take the arm soreness over mashed girly bits, and the hip pain is not from pedaling too hard. I know what that feels like. This is due to overstretching thanks to your overzealous seatpost adjustment. (Okay, that was partly my fault.) I now need to go put my saddle back where it was.