I think if she can control herself at daycare, then she probably doesn't have ODD.

I really don't have any other advice except for the tried and true time outs and following through on consequences. Meaning, if you say you're going to do it, you'd better darn well do it. Yes, it sucks. When you ground your kid from the tv, you feel like you're grounded, too.

It'll get worse before it gets better. Hang in there. You can do it!