Thanks Susan,
Yes everyone and every bike is a little different. I hope you can figure out the issues. I wonder if some of our confusion about pelvic tilt is possibly just confusion in descriptions, hard to figure out.

One sign that your saddle is too high is that your hips will rock from side to side as you hit your downstroke. Perhaps that's what you describe as 'reaching' for the downstroke? No harm is trying different tweakings!

My advice is usually based on just my own experiences, so if you find any stuff in what I say that you can use, then great!