What am I even looking for?!?

[KnottedYet]

Well, I'm not sure why they were recommending a hybrid.

Your descriptions of your needs were so clear from your post that a hybrid didn't really leap to mind, and since you already ride and have a beloved road bike and know your back does well in road-bike position. (I loved my hybrid, I'm not knocking hybrids. If you posted to us that you didn't have a bike at all and were just beginning to explore the different kinds of riding available, and didn't want to be in a road-biker position; you bet we'd've been talking about hybrids we know and love.)

Did you like this shop? Are they worth a second try? Did you feel like they gave you some good reasons why a hybrid would meet your needs, or did it seem more like the standard "woman walks into a bike shop" routine? Did they even offer to let you test ride a cyclocross or mountain bike? Did they even show you what cross and mtb they had?

ETA: cyclocross and road bikes have different geometry. Geometry definitely changes the character of a bike. Cross aren't just road bikes with wider tires slapped on. That sounds kind of like a cop-out on the shop's part. Also, they need to let you ride the bikes AND talk to you about them, not just redirect you. They should let you feel the things they are talking about. I'd have more faith if they said, "Here, ride this cyclocross in the gravel of our parking lot. Then come back and ride this mtb. Last ride this hybrid. Then lets talk about the bikes and the rides." (I guess I'm spoiled by my shop. They never tell me something if they can have me experience it instead.)

ETA #2: I loved my hybrid, it was a Kona Dew. (no suspension) Kona makes a Dew Drop now, which is the Dew but with the dropped bars for the road position you like for your back. http://www.konaworld.com/bike.cfm?content=dewdrop It's very similar in character to a cyclocross bike.