It's never easy dealing with addiction in the family. Working with addicts I get to witness the pain and frustration of loved ones trying to understand why someone will not "just stop" something that is detrimental to their health/wellbeing. Having alcoholics in my family brings it home all the more. Some things stood out from the posts:

Not all addicted individuals are "ok" with their plight. Some feel downright awful about it but feel helpless/hopeless or downright scared to change. But you're right, they have to want to make the changes necessary.

The suggestion of attending Al-Anon meetings is a good one. It can be helpful in dealing with the emotions of coping with alcoholic family members. You could force them into rehab but at what emotional/relationship cost to them and among the family? There is no guarantee that they wouldn't go back to their old drinking patterns once discharged.

Are their physicians aware of their drinking habits? At 80 their metabolisms are not going to handle alcohol consumption as it did in the past. Alcohol with remain in their systems longer. What types of medications are they on normally? Medication function is also impacted by alcohol use. A previous poster asked about celiac. Good question. Also, is either one diabetic? As has been pointed out in other posts, just stopping drinking for them (any alcoholic actually) can be dangerous. Seizures are a problem for alcoholics (actively drinking and detoxing which is why alcohol detox needs to be medically supervised.)

I'd also be curious as to how long the AL facility would be on board with "administering" alcohol. They may look at her recent fall & BAL as a liability for them (I know of someone who was asked to remove a loved one from an AL facility for similar reasons.)

Good luck with this.