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  1. #91
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Seattle
    Posts
    8,548

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    wow! good news!!
    Mimi Team TE BIANCHISTA
    for six tanks of gas you could have bought a bike.

  2. #92
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    3,867
    That's great!

    Karen

  3. #93
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Central Indiana
    Posts
    6,034
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Silver View Post
    This thread started before my Dad's death, then the last post was 11 days after his death.

    Following advice from this group, a lot has happened:

    - Several months ago, we asked Mom to seek counseling. She did.
    - Counselors confirmed that we needed to stop "parenting the parent". We did. She started buying her own Scotch, wound up drunk in the hospital a couple of times (one time at a .28 blood/alcohol level), was on the verge of getting kicked out of her assisted living facility...

    and then:
    - one of her nurses took a personal and caring interest
    - had a heart to heart with her
    - got her into counseling with a different counselor
    - got her to an AA meeting (despite Mom's reservations)

    and now:
    - she voluntarily went into a supervised detox
    - three weeks ago, she "took a chip" at AA
    - and hasn't had a drink in three weeks (longer than at anytime in my 45 years!)

    I think that our "getting out of the way of her making her own choice" is the single biggest thing that will have ever happened to improve her longevity and quality of life.

    Thanks to all who offered the tough advice.
    Mr. Silver and Silver,

    That's great news. I hope your mom continues to stay sober. And good for you for having the courage to step back. I'll keep all of you in my prayers.
    Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.

    --Mary Anne Radmacher

  4. #94
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Between the Blue Ridge and the Chesapeake Bay
    Posts
    5,203
    That is wonderful news, and very inspiring! I'm sure it's been tough, but sounds like you are doing the right thing by letter Mom take responsibility for herself. She's probably finding rather empowering.

  5. #95
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    PA
    Posts
    176
    Congrats for your Mom, and for you for letting her do it herself. It is so hard to stay out of someone's choices when you love them so much, but it is at times the most loving thing to do. Remember that relapse is NOT FAILURE. If your Mom takes a drink, it is an opportunity to learn, not her or your failure. I wish you all the best. Take care.
    "Do or do not. There is no "try." Yoda

  6. #96
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Riding my Luna & Rivendell in the Hudson Valley, NY
    Posts
    8,411
    Quote Originally Posted by invsblwmn View Post
    Remember that relapse is NOT FAILURE. If your Mom takes a drink, it is an opportunity to learn, not her or your failure. I wish you all the best. Take care.
    Wise words. Keep them in mind.
    It's the whole effort and the whole journey that counts, not just one depot stop.
    Lisa
    My mountain dulcimer network...FOTMD.com...and my mountain dulcimer blog
    My personal blog:My blog
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

 

 

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