Commuting when the kids are older

[celticgarden]

I would like to start commuting again but need a sounding board. Kids are 10 and 14 now, able to peacefully hang out on their own for reasonable periods of time. DH still works a 2nd, I work "day" which gets me home by 4 - 4:30. We keep the schedule as it allows him to be there summers, days off school. He leaves 2:30pm.

My question is what other commuting Moms do. Leaving kids by themselves for short periods is no prob. But with a car I can get to them "quickly" should something happen. With a bike not so quickly. I don't want to live in fear. If something "major" went wrong they would know to call 911. We live in a pretty tight neighborhood, we know everyone and kids can reach out to them if necessary (policeman on one side, detective across, good people in other spots).

Am I over thinking this? My commute is only 7 miles one way, part of which is a path beside Route 95, the rest weaving through typical hilly New England coastal neighborhoods. I'd allow 45 mins for the commute to start, car is 20-25 on the way home.

Your opinions welcome!

Linda

[Crankin]

Well, some might disagree, but I say, why don't you try for one day a week and see how it goes. Realistically, if the kids had a *real* emergency, like someone was hurt or a robber was banging down the door, they would call 911 and getting there in 20-25 minutes as opposed to 45 wouldn't matter.
I started leaving my own kids alone, for half an hour to an hour when my oldest was 10 and the younger one 8. The oldest one had completed the Red Cross babysitting class and was quite responsible. They absolutely refused to go to the babysitter up the street after school, until I got home from work. I worked 40 miles away, so my commute, although all on the highway, was about 45 minutes. They were fine and we never had one incident. Although, they later told me about a few incidents where they did things I would have screamed about, like jump off of the back deck into the high snow banks . Both of my boys did a ton of babysitting, starting at age 12, and the second one actually bought his first mountain bike with the money he saved from babysitting. He took care of 3 kids at once, one who was 5 months old; I have no idea how he learned to change a diaper, but he did plenty of that.
The bottom line is, if you trust your kids, give them trust. At fourteen, I wouldn't think about it, unless my kid had done things to show me he couldn't be trusted.

[Tri Girl]

I agree with Crankin. They are at the age where they can be left alone for short periods without too much worry. I would try one day a week, then up it from there as you feel comfortable. If you feel that you have reliable neighbors and you know the kids can handle scary situations with a 911 call- then it seems you are good to go.
I think seeing you set a priority of living healthy and riding to work provides an immeasurable good example for your children (not to mention showing you trust them by leaving them alone)!!

[Melalvai]

I love these replies. I was afraid the responses would be "How could you even think about leaving your precious ones by themselves?" or "Parents are so overprotective, I can't believe you're even worried about it." Opposite responses that are both judgmental & rude.

I like the "try it & see" approach. I know that my sister & I had plenty of hair tearing fights and we made SURE parents' didn't find out because they had too many other worries and there weren't any options; the jobs were an hour away. But that doesn't mean anything because every set of kids is different.

[Biciclista]

In an emergency, you could take a cab! I think your plan is excellent. Go for it!

[Tri Girl]

In an emergency, you could take a cab!

Excellent idea- one I hadn't thought of! Or, if need be, I'm certain a co-worker would happily drive you home in an emergency.