I felt I needed to express this somewhere, so why not here, I guess.....

I broke up with my bf last June, in Oct. he went back to his old gf, about whom he complained bitterly throughout the course of our relationship. He had a photo of her up in his bedroom the entire year and 1/2 we were together, saying he just couldn't be bothered to take it down. I respected him and didn't push it. Yes, I am a dumbass.

It has been super painful for me. We are not talking (I told him in Oct. I wanted 6 months of no contact to move through these feelings on my own), and I'm really very angry and hurt and missing him daily. I was NOT looking forward to this Vday, last year we spent it happily together.

I have an appointment to take my dog to a new holistic vet today for some acupuncture (he's got mobility problems), and I looked up the directions on a map last night and realized that the vet is about two blocks from where ex-bf lives, an area I have completely avoided since Oct. So I am feeling sick with dread that I may run into him today of all days. But I just gotta do it.

I keep asking myself what would I tell myself if it were someone else feeling this way (that often helps me be nicer to myself), and I guess I'd tell them that it's ok to feel bad, I'm entitled; the worst that will happen is that I'll see him and it will hurt but I'll survive, I don't deserve to be hurt by him any more. But I still feel sick to my stomach.