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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    403

    heckled two times in 1 week

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    So, I commute every day of the year on my bike (okay, I walked two days last winter). But, you get the picture. I live in a college town, and readily admit this town wouldn't be what it is without students. Nonetheless, the students have returned, and two times in one week, I have been honked and yelled at by 1) a middle aged woman, and 2) a frat boy type guy. Now, the first time, I was riding outside of the 'door prize' region on a small block between campus and the main street in town. This is such a small road that there are no lines in the middle and no makers for a bike lane. I always try to ride politely and was honked at out of the blue... the second time, I was stopped at a red light (and so was the guy who honked and yelled). This guy chased me across the intersection and rode my @$$ until he couldn't get onto campus. Both times I was baffled at the anger a (polite) human on a bike can cause in those in cars... completely baffled...

    I will say that I am beginning to understand some of the root problems between cars and bikes - no wonder those on bikes throw the finger from time to time. We silently ride while people scream at us and honk and drive aggressively around us... one day, I'm sure I'll throw the finger too...

    Opinions? Suggestions? My dbf suggested I take out my cell phone and photograph their license plate then ride on (both instances involved sitting at a red light with someone yelling at me).

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Alabama
    Posts
    71
    I would say just ignore them. (or smile and wave - that's what I do!) You have just as much right to be there as they do.
    Amy

    Kickin' it old school on my Huffy, but hey, I RIDE!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    California's Central Valley
    Posts
    106
    I agree that ignoring is the best, though sometimes hardest, thing to do. One of my co-workers and I just had this conversation the other day. She's a runner in obviously good physical condition (and ex-military) but gets harrassed and indimidated by motorists (and even other pedestrians) fairly frequently. I'm not naive but even so I was shocked at the rudeness of the stuff people say to her. In that context, I'm sure I'd get upset, angry and embarassed by whatever was said.
    I just had my first comment tossed at me yesterday on the way home and even though it was very tame, it did leave me wondering why people feel the need to say *anything* at all...I was heading home from work on the bike path portion of the ride when I passed a group of 3 teenage boys carrying skateboards. One of them called out-"Wanna race?!" and then they all laughed-yes, very tame, pretty innocent, and kinda funny. Could have been a lot worse for sure-he probably would have beat me!
    You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
    - Eleanor Roosevelt

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    San Diego, CA
    Posts
    1,316
    What kind of things get yelled at someone like your very fit, former-military runner friend? I mean, I get the occasional stare or outright snort from people walking around the lake, but no one's ever yelled something abusive at me.

    I don't usually ride on regular streets, though, so I've never heard it.

    Roxy
    Getting in touch with my inner try-athlete.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    California's Central Valley
    Posts
    106
    Quote Originally Posted by channlluv View Post
    What kind of things get yelled at someone like your very fit, former-military runner friend? I mean, I get the occasional stare or outright snort from people walking around the lake, but no one's ever yelled something abusive at me.

    I don't usually ride on regular streets, though, so I've never heard it.

    Roxy
    She says people mostly yell stuff like, "get off the road b****" and sometimes comment on her race (she's caucasian). She is by no means a timid person but, as she said to me, "when you are out on a road and a car drives by and says something, you get a little scared if there is no one else around.". She carries pepperspray but has only used it on a dog so far.
    We live in an area where there is a lot of gang activity and random violence is not unheard of so I can understand her apprehension.
    You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
    - Eleanor Roosevelt

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Beautiful NW or Left Coast
    Posts
    5,619
    if it's possible, I try to get close and talk to them in a calm pleasant voice. THey hate to be confronted with your humanity.
    "why were you yelling at me?"
    "do I know you?"

    stuff like that.
    I like Bikes - Mimi
    Watercolor Blog

    Davidson Custom Bike - Cavaletta
    Dahon 2009 Sport - Luna
    Old Raleigh Mixte - Mitzi

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Riding my Luna & Rivendell in the Hudson Valley, NY
    Posts
    8,408
    Quote Originally Posted by Biciclista View Post
    if it's possible, I try to get close and talk to them in a calm pleasant voice. THey hate to be confronted with your humanity.
    "why were you yelling at me?"
    "do I know you?"

    stuff like that.
    I use this tactic a LOT in life's confrontational moments. It's my favorite and most effective means of dealing with difficult people!
    Lisa
    My mountain dulcimer network...FOTMD.com...and my mountain dulcimer blog
    My personal blog:My blog
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    San Francisco, CA
    Posts
    564
    Blow a kiss at 'em.

    -- gnat! (I pretend they're complimenting how my butt looks in spandex)

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    WA State
    Posts
    4,364
    There's a woman around here who deals with those types by putting her best "mom" on..

    [in a really concerned tone] I heard you yell, but I couldn't tell what you were saying. Are you OK - do you need help, are you asking me for help? Can I call someone for you? Your parents, the police - is everything OK...
    "Sharing the road means getting along, not getting ahead" - 1994 Washington State Driver's Guide

    visit my flickr stream http://flic.kr/ps/MMu5N

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    San Diego, CA
    Posts
    1,316
    Oh, now that's funny.

    Roxy
    Getting in touch with my inner try-athlete.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    403
    Eden, Bicyclista, Fabulous ideas! The middle age woman wanted me to come over to her driver's side window (geticulating angrily), and I just said in a friendly (confused) voice, "bicycles can take the lane here". I think going over and asking her if she was okay would have been funnier. My response is to become very confused (why are they yelling at me? do I in fact know them? should I get off the road - major accident ahead?), then I get scared (are they going to run me off the road?), then I get mad

    I need to let it roll off my back. I love the 'mom' voice - excellent!

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    pacific NW
    Posts
    1,038
    Oh, the things that have been yelled at me!!! You'd think it was a crime to be a fat lady on a bike around here. It's been worse since school is out and the kids all like to hang around the trail. I've found the most effective response, for instance, when passing a group of teenage boys, hooting about my fat b!tchitude, is to slow down enough to make eye contact and say " YOU have a NICE day, now!" Those particular boys don't yell at me anymore. Some times they say "have a nice day" in an ironic tone when I pass, but considering the alternative, I'll consider that a huge improvement.

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    199
    ugh.. people suck.

    I've been yelled at plenty (and I've only been riding 5 months or so). I just ignore it, or I'll wave and smile... I really like the idea of blowing a kiss at people.

    My mom used to quote a verse from Proverbs (25:21-22) that still brings a smile to my face (emphasis mine):
    "If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the LORD will reward you."

    I just like the mental image of heaping burning coals on someone's head I guess Mom knew the way to get me to be nice back to someone was to give me some sort of vindication

    An incident last week freaked me out.
    I was on a women's group ride with ~18 other riders, and I was at the front of the paceline. A truck passed us, nearly clipped my front wheel, and then slammed on his brakes about 50 ft. in front of me. I thought he was going to get out of the truck or something. He sat there for about 15 seconds (it seemed like an eternity) then sped off.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    403
    lo123,

    HOLY COW! I would have been shaking like a leaf! I'm sorry! It's amazing to me how we tend to lose our humanity or something when we put on a helmet and get on a bike. We change from people to icons to hate... I am astounded at the level of anger in people towards those of us on bikes...

    I'm glad you weren't hurt!

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    the dry side of Washington
    Posts
    149
    +1 to Gnat23 and Eden . made me laugh. and +1 to lo123 (my mom made me quote that one and another- Philippians 4:8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. That tatic almost always calmed me down)

    But I just don't understand why people even bother. I know it's a stretch. But they could just mind their own business.
    Women are. Like tea bags; you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water~ Eleanor Roosevelt

 

 

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