Thread Drift

[Pax]

Cool beans, a new hobby! Glad you're enjoying it.

[indysteel]

Hey guys! Sorry I haven't been around much lately. I have a new obsession, which is that I am learning to play guitar! It's been really fun, and not as hard as I was expecting. I haven't been riding at all, but it hasn't been a good winter for it anyway, so it's been good to have something else to do. It's been so long since I've learned anything new, as a total beginner, and it's really refreshing.

Anyway, I just wanted to say hi and let you know I didn't fall through the ice!

How fun, Red! I'm glad you're doing well. Don't be a stranger; we've missed you here at TE!

[indysteel]

I think I finally made a friend in my not-so-new town. As I've chronicled here in past threads, DH and I moved to a small-ish town south of Indy in the fall of 2009. It's been damn near impossible to meet anybody and it's really worn on me. I'm a relatively social person, and it's been a lonely transition.

Well, after my workout on Saturday, I started chatting with one of the fitness instructors about her class while we were cleaning up in the locker room of the town's fitness and recreation center. She invited me to yesterday's class, an offer which I readily accepted. It was fun; we did a combination of Bosu and resistance training and core work. I chatted with her again after class. She's very friendly, is roughly my age (46 to my 43) and works as a teacher in Indy. Her husband works for the same company as my husband (it's a huge company and they work for different divisions). From the sound of it, she's very active and, like me, loves to read. So, we seemingly have a few things in common. If nothing else, she'll be a friendly and familiar face, and I'll take that at the rate I'm going. The rec center, while convenient to my house, is not the friendliest of places. People really keep to themselves there, which is very different from gyms I've used in the past.

I also signed up for the class. It's called "Total Fit" and meets for a hour four nights a week and Saturday morning. There's no way I'll make it to every session, but it can augment what I already do. They try to mix the activities up each class between three different instructors, and that will likely prove beneficial to me, as I tend to get in a rut. The classes at our rec center are crazy cheap ($60 for roughly 45 classes), so I don't mind paying for something that I won't fully use at that rate.

The Universe has thrown me a few bones of late. Late last fall, I realized that there was a yoga studio not too far from my house, which has helped me add in one or two extra yoga classes into my schedule. And my running has gone from near-torture to I-think-I'm-actually-enjoying this. It's taken me a few couple of years to get back to a stable and full exercise routine thanks to the move and a series of injuries. I'm so grateful to have finally found a new normal. It'll soon be road and mountain biking season again, and I'm really hoping for a good summer (if it's not as hot as last summer).

Yay!

[Crankin]

And you, too Lisa!

[redrhodie]

And you, too Lisa!

+1 on that! We miss you, too, Lisa.

[indysteel]

+1 on that! We miss you, too, Lisa.

+2!!!

[Biciclista]

Hi RedRhodie
Lisa told me you were asking about me. I feel bad posting here because I feel like an imposter, not riding that much, not having any big rides in my future, and not having my sweetie's prowess to brag about.
I AM still riding, but not a lot, I am taking classes (yoga, pottery, italian) and walking as much as i can, doing my best to have a full life as a single retiree. Losing a good husband leaves a huge hole in your life, let me tell you.
I spent much of the end of last year just buzzing around in my house, cleaning, painting and reorganizing. As soon as the new quarter (January) began, i redirected my energy outwards.

Being a widow is hard because you have got this guy that you love and you still want to talk about and most people don't want to talk about him anymore.

After Donald died, I gave a friend a photo Donald had taken of him on his bike (he was going to put it in a show, he liked it so much) and the friend sent an email to our whole club thanking ME for the #$@#$ photo. He never gave Donald any credit at all.
When you lose a loved one, a parent, a grandparent, you grieve, but I can tell you right now, it is NOTHING NOTHING like losing your "better half" I had no idea, was totally unprepared for just how huge this would be.

So what must one do? I stay busy, i make lots of plans with people, places to go, etc; and yet, unbidden, often, tears fall. I never know when it's going to happen, but happen it does.
A LOT. I've cried more in the last 7 months than I had in the last 55 years!. maybe even in my whole life. I am thinking of marketing the stuff; "Widow's tears" maybe it's good for something. So if you met me on the street, i'd act normal, laugh, smile talk... but there's still that hole. If you know a widow, give her a call.

and thanks for asking about me.

[Crankin]

So glad to see you here, Mimi. You are not the only one here who is not riding that much, so don't fret about that!
Grief has its own schedule and everyone experiences it differently. It sounds like you are doing what's right for you.
How is it going with the Italian? I ask because I sit here with the Rosetta Stone Italian loaded on my computer, but I haven't started it yet. Every time I attempt to learn even the rudiments of a language, I end up getting it confused with the small amount of functional Spanish I know. Maybe, when i start, we can converse in Italian....
It's really good to see you here and I am so glad I got to meet you last summer.

[Catrin]

Thanks for the update, I've been wondering.

[Catrin]

What everyone else said...it is great to see/hear from you and please don't stay away! Sending warm hugs and wishes your way.

[Crankin]

Well, I have 0 miles, V. Outdoor miles, anyway. Usually my first outdoor ride is this weekend and as of this minute, we are at the tail end of a snow storm that has lasted 2 days and we have about 13 inches of snow at my house. I'm more concerned with getting more x country skiing in, because in these parts it's a small window of time to do that.
I think it's probably natural for most of us to branch off into other sports. That way, we don't get burned out. I would say I am still primarily a cyclist, but there's a lot of other stuff I do, too.

[Veronica]

Yeah, I've had a lot of time on the trainer too. I could have been riding outside, but I don't like having to bundle up.

Veronica

[emily_in_nc]

Glad to hear from you, Mimi. I suffered greatly after losing my dad in 2005 because it was so sudden and unexpected (car accident). I grieved and cried and kind of crawled into a hole for months and months -- and spent about 9 months off any bicycle. So I'm not at all surprised at what you are going through as I would expect it to be even more difficult to lose a beloved spouse/best friend. We all grieve differently, but I know it is hard to know what to say to someone who has lost a loved one. Even though I've been through the pain of it (albeit in a different way since I lost a parent rather than a spouse), I still find myself tongue-tied around someone else who has had a significant loss.

I hope that you will feel welcome here any time. We're a community of friends who happen to be cyclists. Most of us have probably taken breaks from the bike for various reasons from time to time, but we still belong here, I think.

Hugs to you...

[Biciclista]

you guys are all awesome. Thanks

[kajero]

I understand all your losses and although I don't know any of you, it's wonderful to see the support you have for each other. I kind of quit riding last August, blaming it on work issues. Now I wonder if it was more because my father died. Maybe although I didn't know it, I didn't ride because of unacknowleged grief. I know i didn't feel like do anything; I thought it was workcausing it. Now i see that maybe it wasn't. Please take care of yourselves. These forums have been a tremendous help for me--for support and advice on everything.