Congratulations on deciding to commute. Your post sounds exactly like me a couple of months back. I took it in steps, started riding the bus to work with my bike and then riding (10-12 miles) home. When we have a particularly bad hail or lightning storm I'll take the bus back but I'm always seriously bummed when that happens (though it still means riding 3 miles or so). I used to think that the interstate was the most direct way to work and my initial commute was longer by bike. Since then I've been able to shave off a couple of miles by following little previously-unknown roads, or little paths that connect things more efficiently. I can bypass a huge tangle of roads in the business park between the interstate and our office so I think my commute is actually shorter now.

I tend to meander home and often follow other bikes when they turn somewhere that seems to be going in the same direction I'd like to. Sometimes I turn around but sometimes I learn a cool new little road or path. The other bikes always know the best routes. I also commute on my mountain bike (with a rack, it's terribly loud!) so that I can take some fun trails that just happen to parallel the road when I am not in a hurry.

So, do you ever get over the fear? Well, if you're doing it right, no. Cars can easily kill you and it's dangerous not to be afraid of them. But it is also dangerous to be afraid to the point that you are shaky or not making good decisions, so I think that you are doing the right thing by practicing on your route and getting familiar with the timing before you try it 'for real'. I also have started running almost all of my errands on my bike. City traffic and having to cross lanes have helped me with my confidence in traffic.

As for crossing like a pedestrian, I think it's easier for cars to see you if you act like any other vehicle, but sometimes I have to use pedestrian crossings in places where I want to go through a red light that I can't trigger with my bike or where I'd have to cut through 5 lanes of heavy traffic + construction in less than 50 feet! If you use pedestrian crossings be very careful of people turning right on red lights. Make sure that they see you and that they aren't turning before you cross. If you are like me your confidence in turning left in the standard lanes will improve as you become more familiar with your commute.

In the last week we have had a lot of afternoon thunderstorms predicted so I have started riding in the morning to be sure that I get the ride in. Of course I usually get to ride home too. But having the bus as a backup for dangerous conditions is a good way to get me out the door with the bike. I haven't driven to work in over 2 months. Commuting by bike I leave the house feeling like I'm going on a bike ride and when I walk out the door of the office I am off work; I don't have to wait for half an hour in a metal box on a congested freeway until I am finally free. I hope that it will be as positive an experience for you as it is for me.

Anyhow, hope that is of some help. Good luck with the commute and most importantly enjoy it!

Anne