Help...a dare devil is reborn!

[JoyfulGirl]

These stories are making me ill. :/ I'd know better than to grab someone's handelbars or otherwise knock them about while riding on a bike at least. but it makes me wonder what else common sense wise I should know that I don't. I'm going to go spend a bit reading up on bicycling safety. :/

[Geonz]

It *is* possible to "horse around" reasonably safely; one of our guys is famous for cavorting off and hopping around while we're doing that dull road bike thing. He is *highly* skilled and doesn't get in anbody's space and, basically, gets to have fun, show off / practice some skills, and not annoy or endanger anybody.

So, I wouldn't say there's anything wrong with hopping a curb, per se. There is something wrong with having a need to make other people nervous & scared. If that's the fundamental motivation here, I'd be asking some big questions (and reading some of the other threads about relationships...)

[Veronica]

Actually it depends on the city. My hometown has a law where bicyclists of all ages MUST wear helmets. Some bigger cities are getting with this program too, like Dallas, Texas.

California has a helmet law for children. It's not enforced, at least not in my town. :-(

And I'm not a big fan of nanny laws.

V.

[Barb]

California has a helmet law for children. It's not enforced, at least not in my town. :-(

And I'm not a big fan of nanny laws.

V.

I'm with you V.


Anyway, we did have a good talk. He laughed at first, thinking I was being overly cautious. I finally got through to him. We haven't had time to ride together (he doesn't ever go when I do a serious ride). This really is just how he always played as a kid and he didn't think much about it. I do know that he won't ride at all on rodes with traffic. He only likes the safer quite neighborhood streets. I guess he does have SOME sense! Thanks for your support on this.

[mimitabby]

well, Barb
that is a relief! He sounds reasonable.

[Tuckervill]

I didn't read all the posts, yet, so I may be the lone dissenter.

The guy obviously has some mad skills. I think that's cool, especially since he's almost 50. I don't think it's a bad idea to use them or practice them or whatever.

Guys think differently about these things. I have 3 sons, two of whom are grown up, with the last one at 12. I came to realize that I can't really control how they use their bodies. If they want to skateboard and ride bikes and fast motorcycles and do crazy tricks, then to the extent that they *can* do them, I shouldn't really stand in their way. I get much more cooperation in the safety department if they know that I trust their judgment. They actually interact with me when they want to try something beyond their skill level. They ask me to spot them, or encourage them, or offer advice or my opinion about whether "it" can be done.

In return, because we are in a relationship that goes both ways, they are safety conscious. They use appropriate safety gear. (My motorcycle-riding son's wife has seen to it he has complete roadrash-preventative equipment...bless her. And he asked me what I thought before he even bought the motorcycle.) If I harped on them about *not* doing anything dangerous or risky, they'd cease to trust me. If I refused to watch or participate or just turned my back, I'd miss out on a big part of their lives. They wouldn't believe that I trusted them, either. Trust in our relationship is very important to me.

Now, that doesn't mean I have to lie down on the street so they can jump their bikes over me. Where my safety and property is involved, I have the right to set boundaries. That means no riding too close to me or whizzing a ball past my head or jumping off the roof onto the trampoline or playing whiffleball next to my 110-year-old windows.

The important thing is to come to an agreement about where the boundaries are. You could refuse to ride with him or you could feel scared when you do. Or, you could negotiate the no cutting off part with looking the other way on the helmet issue. There are always more than the two extremes. If I were you and I cared about the relationship, I'd try to find some options in the middle.

Karen