Trying to get out of my funk...

[RoadRaven]

I stll have days where it all seems so wrong, and writing this has set me off, but things are getting better...

Hugs Millie
We were in contact around this time in PMs... My life has been busy and I have neglected to see how you are faring
Its a long journey, but hopefully you - and Veronica - will begin to have more patches of light in your days more often, than those patches of darkness
Arohanui, Rave

[Velobambina]

V--

Many words of wisdom in this thread, particularly LTBC's wonderful advice & words of comfort. I won't repeat what others have so beautifully wrote. Just know that I share the same sentiments and am thinking of you.

[yellow]

V, I have some extra yippee in my life right now, so I'm sending some your way.

[jobob]

Just don't make her run 50 K !

[maillotpois]

Freak.

[teigyr]

I'll ditto what everyone else has said. When I lost my oldest cat, it was the hardest. He had been with me so long and we had been through so much together, I almost couldn't remember a time when he wasn't there.

That weekend, DH (before he was DH) tried to keep me busy. I would just burst out crying for no reason, even if we were in public. I had so many regrets because I had always told G (my cat) that I'd have a house where he could have an area to go outside. When I fell asleep, I would dream that he was in the house. My gym instructor, who just lost her dog, has had the same reaction with the dreams and sadness.

It takes time. Just get out when you can, even if you think everyone can tell you've been crying. It never goes away but it gets better.

[LBTC]

You know, I still haven't figured out why we all try so hard to not cry in public. When we lost our Yogi dog - he was our first big loss, and it was a very difficult situation - I went back to work and, if I needed to cry, I just did. I'd just be sitting at my desk working and become overwhelmed by the sadness for a moment. The tears would come, and slide down my cheeks, like little bits of sadness, regret, fear, emptiness falling out of me. Very quickly, there would be fewer tears, they wouldn't be as hard, they didn't happen as often. Everyone at work knew what had happened, so I never had to explain it to anyone, thankfully.

Like everything else, it gets easier with time.

Hugs and butterflies,
~T~

[BikeMomma]

Hugs, Veronica. I so feel where you are right now.

The others are right, of course - it will get better. We each have our own way to deal with loss, so I say just go with each moment of grief as it comes and don't fret about it. It's ok to be sad. Someone further up the thread said to make yourself get up, start your workout, and give yourself 10 minutes. I like this advice. Myself, I find the best times to deal with my emotions is when I'm focused during exercise. In fact, I crave exercise more when I'm going through something trying.

Petwise, what helped me through the passing of my beloved dog Roxy from cancer three years ago is to just imagine her there with me. It was a comfort to think that her spirit may be there, if only in my imagination. Yea, I cried often and at strange moments, especially when I would pass the pet cemetary next to the freeway where I had her cremated. I'm sure other motorists thought I was loony.

Roxy's death left me petless for the first time since I was an infant and with an immense gap in the family unit. So, I knew we would eventually get another pet, but I did not feel ready for about 5 solid months. After that, I started visiting the local shelter in search of the particular breed we had picked out. Being around those dogs helped too.

In time, about 6 months to the day after Roxy's exit, we welcomed home Mayah. She filled that gap and then some! Interestingly, Mayah was about 6 months old when she joined us. So, I figure Mayah was born around the same time Roxy died. Just the thought of that brings me comfort too -- because Mayah is as old as Roxy's death, it's almost like Mayah was literally sent from doggie heaven. She's three now, and just had a birthday.

Take care, V. I'll be thinking of ya.
~BikeMomma (Kim)

[Mr. Bloom]

V,

I can't add anything except to let you know that the Silver's know how you feel - particularly this time of year.

Hang in there and know that you're not alone...

[Veronica]

It's been a good week so far. I did some yoga Tuesday and Wednesday mornings and I got out for a short ride after work today. It feels good to be moving toward my goals again.

Thom had a job interview today that went well. He's got two other jobs "pending". They are taking FREAKIN'FOREVER to decide. Well I know we are fine for a few more months, I still felt quite relieved when he called to say that he thought this one might result in an offer. Of course so may the other two... but they can't seem to get off the pot!

He started putting in baseboards today. Oh my, someday my house is going to be so pretty! The new baseboards are a really nice white and look so good against the maple flooring. Right now... our office is strewn all over the place. I'm not sure where we will put our Christmas tree.

V.

[solobiker]

Hang in there V, things will get better. You have been going through a lot of changes, some big and some not so big, and they all add up. Remember to take time for yourself and do what you enjoy doing because I will help to clear your mind and renew your body. Take care and good luck to Thom.