Bad PMS attack brewing

[makbike]

Okay, ladies I need your help once again. I feel a major PMS bout approaching and I feel very, very blue and it is only Tuesday. I hate to think where I'll be emotionally by the end of the week

Just a little backgroup/update: I had surgery on June 12 to remove a softball size dermoid cyst and my left ovary. I also had my right tube tied off during the surgery. On June 14 my BF (now ex-BF) of 3 1/2 years appeared on my doorstep unannouced and shared with me he was ending our relationship. I have for the past three weeks handled my emotions well. Weekends suck but that is to be expected given we spent every weekend together. However, Sunday evening - Friday evening I typically feel very upbeat. I'm also seeing a counselor on a weekly basis for help and insight. Now the PMS is brewing and I feel like I'm backsliding emotionally. It did not help that exBF was at the club ride to or that he sent me a congratulations note last night for a silly club event.

Please does anyone have any suggestions on handling this PMS event and keeping my emotions in check? I would appreciate any suggestions.

Thanks!

[Tater]

Oh, darn. I don't have anything constructive to say, but hang in there! ((((Makbike))))

[sbctwin]

You have been through a lot in the past month. Whether it is pms or grieving for your losses in the past month, you need time to heal. Sometimes life just hands us crap and it is ok to just get down. You sound like you are doing everything right (whatever that is for you), but we grieve anyway. I hope you feel the hug I am sending you now.....

[F8th637]

• Have a good cry, I think you well deserve one
• Eat some chocolate (aka spoil yourself)
• Go for a good long, cathartic bike ride
• Don't do anything you don't want to do

Big hugs! You've definitely gone through a lot and you seem to be handling it all quite well. Just remember that the hormones aren't helping. Good luck!

[SouthernBelle]

Do you have a couple of girlfriends you can plan something with for the weekend??

[teigyr]

I think everyone has given some great ideas. You have been through SO much too.

Back when I had PMS (been about 10 years but when I had my surgeries, I pretty much was gutted so there went PMS!) I'd just tell myself exactly what it was. I couldn't change my feelings but I would say "I'm feeling this because it's PMS and it'll go away and I will feel better". I don't know if that makes sense but even though I felt SO emotional, a part of me knew it wouldn't be for long.

I'd say do something for you. What have you put off but wanted to do? Or is there something you've wanted but couldn't really justify it? I'm not talking high dollar but something little. Maybe book a massage or facial. Let someone pamper you. You deserve it.

Don't know about exBF sending notes. Seems like even though you see each other at club events, he has to realize it's painful and maybe there should be some boundaries.

[makbike]

Sadly, I'm the only single in the group. They all have families/husbands so weekends are filled with family responsibilities.

I think I'll ride a century on Saturday - that will keep me busy for a few hours and hopefully I'll sleep well afterward. There is an club ice cream ride on Sunday and I'll attend that even though exBF will be there to share his tales of his RAIN ride with those who will listen (I won't be in that crowd).

I've tried the chocolate. I've logged nearly 400 miles for this month alone. I've pulled out my cross stitch and have been sewing like a mad woman. I've typed a letter to exBF (never to be mailed) spilling out my emotions. I've cried most of the day. I spent an hour on the phone with my best friend who quickly reminded me why our breakup is a good thing, etc. At least for the time the tears have stopped.

I know things will get better once the hormones (damn that remaining ovary) return to normal levels. How can something so tiny have such a major impact on your emotional state?

[teigyr]

Hmmm. I think you need to respect that ovary!!! Really! I miss mine.

Writing is good as is riding. You're not backsliding, it's just like that sometimes. As you deal with it all, more emotions that were hidden come out. It's good for you to feel these things even though I know it's not much fun.

Do you have any other projects to work on or any goals that need accomplishing? And yes, you ARE better off now! It will get so much better.

[northstar]

Hugs. Wow, you've been through a lot lately. I'm sorry to hear that you are having a hard time...it's understandable!

I like a good cry in a nice hot bubble bath. It usually wears me out enough so that I don't take out my stress on others.

I also am exceptional at cleaning the house and decluttering when I am b*tchy.

[Duck on Wheels]

• Have a good cry, I think you well deserve one
• Eat some chocolate (aka spoil yourself)
• Go for a good long, cathartic bike ride
• Don't do anything you don't want to do

Big hugs! You've definitely gone through a lot and you seem to be handling it all quite well. Just remember that the hormones aren't helping. Good luck!

I second that emotion.
Don't see why you should need to control your emotions given recent events. Treat yourself to a good cry. Let go ... and feel the relief when you realize that you will, after a bit, stop crying all on your own. If you find it hard to start, maybe a good sad movie on the dvd can help. Have comfort food handy. Then when the cry ends, take a good hot shower or bath so you feel even more refreshed. And be sure to have the next day off so you can do something fun to celebrate, like go for an exilerating ride, preferably with a good gang of friends. And I do mean celebrate. You may discover, after the cry, that you're quite happy to be alive, to have many much better friends than XBF turned out to be, to have hormones still doing their thing, and ... well, whatever makes you happy when not overshadowed by all that's landed on your lap lately.

[Geonz]

What Duck said. You *know* the source of these emotions. It's not sanity you are lacking; these are normal, healthy responses to biological and emotional conditions. You don't need to try to do anythign social or anything you don't want to do... you do need to watch the cycles of your thoughts and have the right phone numbers if they go too far into the darkness.
Bicycles and chocolate and movies are good... This Too Shall Pass from darkness into light.