I hate being called "nurse"!!!

[colby]

I crack up at something in the fitness industry -- coaches who call themselve "Coach Bob" or "Coach Tim" or "Coach Dan." WTF. I'm a full-time coach -- I do this for a living -- and I don't call myself Coach Lorri. I'm also an MBA (and a BFA). Maybe I should be Coach Lorri, BFA, MBA.....

We get the same thing in IT. People who sign with their gazillion certifications, their title, you name it. I rarely sign my last name, let alone my qualifications! Then when I do, I get bitten anyway, because my title is a little deceptive... I have a management type title, but nobody is truly "management" in a small company. Sigh...

I travel with my company (network security software) doing trade shows and such sometimes (answering questions for passers-by and during presentations), and I get the assumption that I'm just a marketing or sales person all the time. "Are you a sales person? Marketing?" "No, I'm an engineer." "Oh, really?" <they take two steps back, shocked by the news> "Yes, now what can I do for you?"

They will happily talk over my head, around me, behind me, next to me, to our MALE sales people or a MALE engineer should there be one. ARGH. I've had this problem with co-workers, too, it's like I have to prove not only that I'm good enough, but that I'm so good that I didn't take the job away from some man... or something. And somehow so many guys remember that one experience they had with that one even SLIGHTLY incompetent woman (probably just a miscommunication in the FIRST place) and hold it against every woman they encounter from then on out. Do they consider all men stupid because of all of the stupid men out there? No, just the women.

Hopefully the trails we are blazing today by even discussing and making people aware of these issues will help the daughters of tomorrow... at this point, it's all that keeps me from strangling people who do it

[velogirl]

Yeah, I get that too. I work in a bike shop. When I answer the phone, there are certain customers who immediately want to talk to one of the guys. Doesn't matter what the question is. Doesn't matter that I know more about riding and bikes and mechanics than half our staff. They insist on speaking with a guy.

Now, just to be a tool, I'll tell them that none of the guys are available but that I'm happy to help them.

[SadieKate]

This thread is making me laugh sympathetically. In our company is a Ph.D in something like statistics. We are a medical software company, not academia. Yet, his voice mail is "Hello, you've reached Dr. John Doe's voice mail." He even introduces himself as Dr. So and So when everyone else just gives their name and follows up with the name of their position, such as "I'm Jane Smith, I'm the medical director." It sounds so very weird to my ears, like he's constantly worried that he appears better than everyone else.

[Lise]

I got a name badge at a conference once that read Dr. Lise H--, PhD. Wow, I thought. I went to either medical school or got a doctorate, all in a blackout! We got it corrected. I was presenting at the conference, so I got to announce, "I am not a doctor, I do not have a PhD..."

[Duck on Wheels]

When I was out on maternity leave, 23 years ago, two colleagues were out doing field work on my project. One was a senior researcher, the other a recent hire. The recent hire was sent out to learn the field from the senior researcher. When they appeared together, everybody ignored the senior researcher and directed their questions and answers to the junior. They also constantly asked whether my senior colleague was a nurse and whether my junior colleague was a doctor. Now guess what their respective genders were. Not hard to guess, huh? Both were social scientists -- excellent ones, though neither has a doctorate. One just got hired into a tenured associate professorship at a Dept. of Community Medicine -- ahead of an M.D. and Dr. Med. with an impressive publication list and a long list of projects and grad students at that very department. Want to guess again which of my former colleagues got the job and what gender the medical and academic doctor was who got passed by? Easy guess again, huh?

Think maybe you don't share those prejudices, that you somehow out of all the many millions within our culture have managed to unlearn them? Try taking a test or two at
http://www.understandingprejudice.org/iat/
It's fun, it's fast, it's anonymous and private, and you might learn something about yourself. I did.

[Nanci]

Oooh, this made me think of an old joke, let's see if I can get it right:

A man and his son were in a serious car accident. The father was killed, but the son was rushed to the hospital with life-threatening injuries. When the son was wheeled into the OR, the surgeon proclaimed "I cannot operate on this boy- he is my son!" How could that be?

[Blueberry]

Sadly, this isn't just true in the medical field.

I'm an attorney. Most recently, I was attending a deposition in Asheville, NC and one of my male co-workers was taking the deposition. The court reporter assumed I was a paralegal or secretary. She was somewhat taken aback when I informed her that I was, in fact, an attorney for one of the parties.

Not at all uncommon - but sad.

[DebW]

Yeah, I get that too. I work in a bike shop. When I answer the phone, there are certain customers who immediately want to talk to one of the guys. Doesn't matter what the question is. Doesn't matter that I know more about riding and bikes and mechanics than half our staff. They insist on speaking with a guy.

Now, just to be a tool, I'll tell them that none of the guys are available but that I'm happy to help them.

Yeah, I used to get that too in 1973. As soon as they'd hear a woman's voice on the phone, they'd say "Can I talk to a mechanic." Happened several times every day. Guess things don't change as fast as we'd hope. I'd usually say "What do you need?" and answer all their questions. But sometimes I just couldn't take it anymore and would hand the phone to a guy.

[Bron]

Well where I work I think more than 50% of people have a PhD, so they came up with a solution to the title problem - nobody is allowed to use their title at work. No titles on doors, id cards, letters, anything. It's then up to us to use surnames or first names as we feel fit (my department is a first names and informal "you","tu","du" depending on the language we are using).

The only thing that annoys me about the title is when people call my husband "Dr" and me "Mrs". Either use it for both of us or neither. I hate being patronised just because I am a woman.

Bron

[KnottedYet]

As far as I'm concerned vets, dentists, psychologists, etc are all "Dr." And durn tootin' I'll use that when addressing them professionally and probably socially as well.

My beef with the ex was the social use. Yup, that PhD in physics is mighty impressive, but SKnot's friends and their parents really don't need to address ya as "Dr. Booger."

[Bad JuJu]

This whole thread just supports the idea that feminism is still an important and necessary movement. I teach college, and so many students think of feminism as a bad word and something that's no longer needed. They buy into the idea that we're in a "post-feminist" period. Well, we have "come a long way, baby," but we still have a long, long way to go before we can call patriarchy and masculinism a thing of the past.

[betagirl]

really don't need to address ya as "Dr. Booger."

That's going to be my official title when I'm done

Hmmm, what are the qualifications to get a "Doctor of Cycling" - CycD....