Electric,

I will agree with the ladies who said that average speed involves many variables. I know it's hard not to compare yourself to other riders, but if you want to continue enjoy the sport you should only compare yourself to your own results. There are always someone faster than you, and at some point it will get too frustrating to not be able to catch that "rabbit". I think it takes some people less effort to improve their speed than others, and you might need a little more time, but if you put determination and chase it down with love for sport then you will get there. When I see someone in the street who is overweight but he/she is biking, running, etc it puts a smile on my face. Like someone said before, "pushing" is different for everybody. Experiment on different things: diet pre/post rides, different types of training, change of scenery and you might get better results. However, I must say that there are so many different women on this board, and everyone has their own opinion, and if they are asked they will voice it. Unfortunately, we don't see their facial expressions and emotions so it's hard to say if they meant their comment to be harsh or not. We are all in the same sport, some people willtry to encourage you and comment on your results, others feel that "encouraging" is not about only looking at a positive side of the story....
In the end you are out riding, doing it, enjoying and wanting to improve and that's awsome in my book