Dear So and So

[DirtDiva]

Well, Ms. Raven, I couldn't let anyone here go assuming that Canterbury hadn't qualified top of the round-robin and earned that home final fair and square.

You know, I give lots of what could be considered in-class timeouts (if someone is preventing someone else from learning, then they will be moved somewhere they won't have the opportunity to continue doing so), but I don't send anyone out of my classroom unless they have done something (i.e. a fist fight) that warrants an immediate visit to the principal's office. It's pointless - most behaviour problems arise when children don't have the skills necessary to complete the work required, and they'll never learn those skills if they're not in the classroom. The single most frustrating aspect of doing supply/relief/sub work is that you simply don't have the opportunity to implement any of the long-term, positive strategies that help those kids so much.

[DrBee]

Dear Postal Service,

Why do you insist on taunting me??? Yesterday you delivered my tire levers, but not the tubes. Now - I know that both boxes were sent at the same time from the same place, presumably. Now, since Monday is a holiday, I will not get me tubes until at least Tuesday! Which is even more torturous, because it's my telecommuting day. So I'll have to look at the tubes, but won't be able to do anything with them until "after work". Torturous!

Sincerely,

REALLY needing to ride my bike

[Nanci]

Dear Wh*re who stole my tube of Aquaphore out of the bathroom during my 9 hour 48 minute death march (Wickham Park Marathon). Thanks a lot. I hope you have a good use for it. Perhaps you, like me, have salt chafing on the insides of your thighs, in about 3" diameter circles, that every time you peed for the next four stops, felt like someone was slicing your inner thighs with razor blades. Or maybe you felt the oncoming of inner arm chafing from the too-rough fabric of your running shirt (the only one that could possibly stay dry and not soak up ten pounds of sweat) and sought to nip that in the bud before they, too, turned into two-inch diameter circles of raw skin. But probably, you are some loser who has never run for 30 seconds in your pathetic life, because you can't put down your smokes long enough to! I hope you enjoyed it!!

Nanci

[DrBee]

Dear Nanci,

Wow - you survived! I've been wondering how you did and I never had any doubts. I'm impressed!

Hoping to just run around the block without stopping,
Fishdr

[Nanci]

Out of 33 starters, 13 people finished the marathon, and two of those went on to finish the 50 miles. 39% finishing rate.

I'll come up with some highlights, but first I have to figure out how to get on my bike for the Memorial Day Bike Club picnic.

Nanci

[jeannierides]

Dear Furniture Shopper,

Don't you realize how rude it is to come into our store talking on your cell phone? You can obviously see me walking up to you in order to greet you. Are you so self-important that you can't put your phone down for a few minutes out of common courtesy?? I promise I won't pin your arm behind your back and make you buy anything!

Sincerely fed up,

[KSH]

Dear Ex Husband,

First off, I really appreciate the fact that you decided we needed a divorce. Trust me, life with you was miserable, and I am glad you left.

True, I wish you would have figured that out BEFORE I spent $2,000 on taking your butt to Paris and England... but... whatever. I also wish you would have left when you had a job, so you could have paid me for the bills you left me with. How nice was I to pay your last cell phone bill, instead of cutting it off the day you left (Oh, and thanks for going over your minutes and never thanking me for not cutting off the phone!).

I also understand that you simply must get married because you have knocked up your girlfriend. I commend you on trying to do the right thing. You certainly never tried to do the right thing with me... unless you think cheating on me and lying to me... was the right thing. OH, wait... you have left her 3 times and you have cheated on her. Ooopss!

But, I truly wish that you would be man enough to pay for half of the divorce that you asked for. It was in the divorce decree that you were to HELP ME PAY for the divorce. Shoot, if it weren't for me doing it, we would still be married.

Of course, you ignored the court date (I think you were too cracked out on speed to make it. Too bad the cops who were looking for you a year later never brought you up on dealing charges.), and the fact that we got divorced.... do you know we are divorced? Maybe a mutal friend told you that we got divorced?

Anyways... from what I hear you have a good job now and a really expensive car... so, it would nice if you would pay for your divorce...before you pay for your second marriage only 1.5 years later.

Yea... that's what I want... for you to PAY FOR THE DIVORCE you wanted.

Sincerely,
Your ex wife (or have you fogotten that you even had a wife #1?)

[DrBee]

Out of 33 starters, 13 people finished the marathon, and two of those went on to finish the 50 miles. 39% finishing rate.

I'll come up with some highlights, but first I have to figure out how to get on my bike for the Memorial Day Bike Club picnic.

Nanci

Dear Nanci,

Good luck! I hope your legs don't rebel. And I hope your weather is better than here - cloudy and drizzly. At least it's not in the 90's - finally.

Fishdr