I don't know. You live in France and don't know the language and culture and make little effort to do so? Then yeah, you're going to be bummed. But get out, learn the language, study the culture, meet people, get involved, no matter where you are--that's key. Can't blame it on the place.


Yeah that is what I felt like saying Tulip, when I read allabouteva's post.

I did that - came to a country where I knew no one except my SO and I got up , got out, met people, learned the language and culture (which I was also living in a sub-culture)... Sure I cried my eyes out at times but its one amazing ride if you take it in the right spirit you can make it - both as a couple and as an individual . I am an integral part of the community in which
I live ; I just happen to have been born somewhere else .
I worked hard and mostly joyfully at the challenge of it all .
But I have also seen a lot of women over the years *not* get to where I am. It is not a journey for anyone and every one. Just look at the Book of Ruth -anthroplogically not necessarily religiously. One daughter-in-law turned back and is not thought less of for that.
The *place* does have its "contribution to the dynamic" (to use diplomatic language); But you can't blame it all on the place. If you make an effort people make an effort back to include and accept you. It's that simple.