My 80's song... Tainted love!!! AAHHHHHHHH!! Now it's in *your* head too huh?!
Cilby, I could identify with alot of what you said. To this DAY I sometimes think of myself as not a 'real' athlete... And I've done a freaking Ironman and countless marathons!!
I also have to have a concrete goal. In fact right now I'm in a training quagmire (did I spell that right??). I haven't registered for anything other than the Walt Disney world Mary next JAN!! I need to get some local races on my schedule here soon! - I know Tracy... Solano beach...I just haven't done it yet, but Terrie has.
And as for working out everyday. I have to really work on this one. I know full well what happens when you don't recover. And I have to remind myself that I get stronger during recovery- not training. Training breaks you down, recovery builds you up. But the type A in me says if I'm not sweating I'm turning to mush..
As for the mental aspect, oh yeah, that is HUGE!! If you ever want to learn about mental training do an Ironman- or a 400-600k brevet like Nanci.
I learned so much about the mental componet not only while training, but during the race itself. People keep asking me how I kept going for almost 17 hours straight. Well, I kept my head in the game. First of all I had to move from cut off time to cut off time, so I focused on those small increments of time, and getting from one to the other. I also did not let my mind wonder to how much farther I had to go, just what was happening at the moment. And during the marathon I had to go inside myself and focus like I never have in my life. I was so focused that I seriously did not know I had anyone behind me! I seriously thought I was the last person. It's a weird sensation, and one that's really hard to describe. I guess you just have to experience it.