I totally raised my kids that way. They knew that DH and I were the team and in the end, we were the bosses. My kids had a lot of freedom, compared to others, but we were strict about some things that others don't care about (write thank you notes, dressing the appropriate way for the setting, working an entry level job). I hated the whole team sports thing, and thankfully my kids stopped that after 6th grade. When the younger one got into bike racing in HS, I took little interest in it until I started riding, which kind of coincided with when he got his license and could drive to races. So, I did go to some races. The parents were not quite as horrible, mostly because the kids on his team came from all different towns. It's also how we got connected up with our former exchange student, who is really like a 3d son. I was the same way with my other son who did band for 8 years. I went to see the performances and picked him up at ungodly hours from competitions and football games, but I was never a "band mom."
Basically DH and I had "plans" and still do, almost every Saturday night of our marriage. That's what my parents did, and so did DH's. We had wonderful teenaged babysitters (who are now in their mid forties ) and my own kids started babysitting themselves at age 11-12.