Thread Drift

[Crankin]

Yeah, DH and I have similar backgrounds on the surface, but not really. My family was wealthy until I was about 13 and then it went to hell when the shoe business left New England. Spent most of my adolescence avoiding my parents and my grandparents did help me. DH comes from more of a blue collar background, where his parents spent everything and his dad was always getting fired. So, he is very good with the money thing, where I just don't like to deal with it.

[Pax]

I think having it once and then losing it would create some anxiety about money. My wife came from a professional family, not wealthy but very comfortable. I came from a blue collar military family where my dad made very little and when we moved (once a year) the govt. would lose his paycheck for two months (minimum). So it was always a case of never enough... things like traveling to a new duty station in AZ from MA in 1968, when we ran out of food in the cooler my folks stopped at a HoJos and and got two plain cheap hot dogs, they ate the buns and my brother and I got the more "nutritious" hot dogs.

[OakLeaf]

I think having it once and then losing it would create some anxiety about money.

That was my grandmother, but it was really my mom who developed the borderline-nutty frugal habits from living through it as a child. From wealth and social status to sudden poverty and ostracization, along with living in four countries on three continents before she was 12 (not military, so without whatever community and language support a child could get from that life). My Oma seemed able to adapt, at least by the time I was old enough to know her. My mom, OTOH - it's really only been since she remarried a year and a half ago that she's eased up on stuff like scrounging expired food at the grocery store (when she's plenty able to afford whatever fresh food she likes).

[ny biker]

Um, so, I just found out that one of my friends died this morning. I had dinner with her and two other friends on Sunday night. She was fine. Talking about a possible new job and her collection of salt and pepper shakers.

A couple of years ago something similar happened with another friend. She had moved a couple of hours away so I hadn't seen her in years but we were in touch on Facebook. One day she was posting about getting lots of work done around the house, the next day she was gone.

[emily_in_nc]

Um, so, I just found out that one of my friends died this morning. I had dinner with her and two other friends on Sunday night. She was fine. Talking about a possible new job and her collection of salt and pepper shakers.

Woah. If you don't mind me being nosy, what happened? People don't usually up and die for no good reason, unless they're in a car/bike/other accident -- or have a stroke or heart attack.

So very sorry for the loss of your friend. That has got to be extremely jarring since you just saw her.

[ny biker]

I don't know what happened (yet). Her sister just posted on her facebook page that she had died unexpectedly. She had been very sick a couple of years ago, due to an infection and complications related to diabetes. She had pretty much recovered from that but I guess it's possible that something else occurred related to the diabetes. She never mentioned other health problems. I haven't seen anything about a car crash on any local news source. Another friend is in touch with the sister to find out if there will be a local service, so she might have more information.

For the friend who died a couple of years ago, I never did find out what happened, since I wasn't close enough to her family. One thing I learned from that experience -- it's important to spend time with people, to make the time to stay in touch.

[OakLeaf]

I'm sorry, NY. That's hard.