Thread Drift

[shootingstar]

I learned some things I never expected when I sold my Toronto condo and some unexpected surprises about buyers:

*There are very judgemental buyers who are racist/judgemental on your last name. My real estate agent (who was white) told me that people would scan the names of owners/occupiers on a condo directory and comment it the names were not Anglo-sounding or European-sounding. Meaning any Asian, East Indian last name was suspect to them as undesirable neighbours.

*There are people who will avoid buying in an area with a lot of local neighbours who have Asian faces. What is the problem?: I'm willing to bet a huge hunk of those "foreign"looking faces know how to speak English.

*My real estate agent had an interesting experience of finding a home for a blind client. She walked with the client around in potential neighbourhoods.

*My condo was sold...interestingly to a woman who was the executive-director for a national non-profit organization for Canadian women prisoners. Her son, a real estate agent brokered the deal for his mother.

[Crankin]

We took down our mezuzah, and all of Jewish art work. However, down in our family room, there are a couple of prayer books on the shelf... not in a really noticable place. I know about that prejudice. In fact, before 1980 or so, Concord was an NJA place. I'll let you figure out what that means. I'd say at least 25% of my neighborhood is Jewish, now, though. There are very few Asians in my town, but the last place I lived (next town) has about a 25% Chinese/Indian population. They often come here with cash in hand, so I don't care who buys my house!
The family that came yesterday is mildly interested. They are relocating from NY, and therefore, do not have the prejudices of a New Englander, against contemporary homes.

[Crankin]

New England. Very common in certain waspy towns. Obviously, not where I grew up.

[Pax]

Feeling a bit subdued today, our closest friend went to the ER back in Illinois last night for chest pains. Hopefully she'll be okay but being so far away just stinks. Guess that's the price you pay when you move away from home.

We don't really have any family at all, or none that we're in contact with, so our friends are our family. Sure does feel lonely now and then.

[Crankin]

I would feel the same way, Pax. My friends have been my family, for a long time.

[rocknrollgirl]

Feeling a bit subdued today, our closest friend went to the ER back in Illinois last night for chest pains. Hopefully she'll be okay but being so far away just stinks. Guess that's the price you pay when you move away from home.

We don't really have any family at all, or none that we're in contact with, so our friends are our family. Sure does feel lonely now and then.

Yes to this, we are in the same boat. I hope your friend is ok.

Back to lurking now....

[OakLeaf]

My uncle died suddenly last week. I hadn't had much contact with him since I was 13 years old and he was on the other side of a big family break-up and I was too Stockholm Syndrome'd to stay connected. I'm glad he and my mom made their peace after my dad died, anyway, and I'm glad I had a chance to chat with him a little bit at my mom's wedding. But his death is bringing up a lot of old stuff for me. I had to fire my therapist, she blew me off one too many times, so you guys get to hear this stuff.

[ny biker]

My uncle died suddenly last week. I hadn't had much contact with him since I was 13 years old and he was on the other side of a big family break-up and I was too Stockholm Syndrome'd to stay connected. I'm glad he and my mom made their peace after my dad died, anyway, and I'm glad I had a chance to chat with him a little bit at my mom's wedding. But his death is bringing up a lot of old stuff for me. I had to fire my therapist, she blew me off one too many times, so you guys get to hear this stuff.

It seems that too many of us have family "stuff." I'm sorry about your uncle.

[Catrin]

My uncle died suddenly last week. I hadn't had much contact with him since I was 13 years old and he was on the other side of a big family break-up and I was too Stockholm Syndrome'd to stay connected. I'm glad he and my mom made their peace after my dad died, anyway, and I'm glad I had a chance to chat with him a little bit at my mom's wedding. But his death is bringing up a lot of old stuff for me. I had to fire my therapist, she blew me off one too many times, so you guys get to hear this stuff.

So sorry to read this about your uncle Oakleaf - "family stuff" makes it even harder - at least that has been my experience.

[ny biker]

We took down our mezuzah, and all of Jewish art work. However, down in our family room, there are a couple of prayer books on the shelf... not in a really noticable place. I know about that prejudice. In fact, before 1980 or so, Concord was an NJA place. I'll let you figure out what that means. I'd say at least 25% of my neighborhood is Jewish, now, though. There are very few Asians in my town, but the last place I lived (next town) has about a 25% Chinese/Indian population. They often come here with cash in hand, so I don't care who buys my house!
The family that came yesterday is mildly interested. They are relocating from NY, and therefore, do not have the prejudices of a New Englander, against contemporary homes.

Even when a potential buyer has no prejudices, I think it makes sense to remove things like religious items as well as family photos and other personal items. Anything that makes a buyer think about the current residents is a distraction from the decision to buy or not.

Pax, I hope your friend is okay.

[OakLeaf]

Pax, hope your friend is okay. Hugs to you.

Crankin, ugh. I wish I could say I hadn't seen the same kind of thing in neighborhoods all over the USA. But you did remind me of the little enameled metal crucifix that was tacked, glued and shellacked over next to an entry door in our house when we bought it. There was no way to remove it without putting an enormous gouge in the door frame - the only reason it's gone now is because a worker slammed that door so hard it broke the frame and we had to replace it.

[lph]

Unrelated: yesterday I joined in on setting up a Facebook group for women kayakers in the Oslo area. Today I posted a little notice on the local kayak club's FB page, just saying "here's a new group, if you're interested".

Within five minutes a guy responded, with "Why only women?"

...

"THAT'S why", is what I should have responded.

What is it with some guys and the sense of entitlement??
Even if he didn't agree, it's truly none of his business whether I choose to start a group for women, or for black metal loving gourmet cook left-handed kayakers in a certain district, or for any other subgroup you can think of.

Sorry, just ranting.

[shootingstar]

Unrelated: yesterday I joined in on setting up a Facebook group for women kayakers in the Oslo area. Today I posted a little notice on the local kayak club's FB page, just saying "here's a new group, if you're interested".

Within five minutes a guy responded, with "Why only women?"

...

"THAT'S why", is what I should have responded.

What is it with some guys and the sense of entitlement??
Even if he didn't agree, it's truly none of his business whether I choose to start a group for women, or for black metal loving gourmet cook left-handed kayakers in a certain district, or for any other subgroup you can think of.

Sorry, just ranting.

And it's just kayaking. It's not about a life and death matter.

[Crankin]

I'd be pissed, too,lph.
House saga has not been going well in the last 24 hours. Came home from work yesterday and they had installed the for sale sign. Except, they installed it next to my mailbox, which is across the street from my house, as all of the boxes are on one side of the street. I laughed. Called the agent and today the sign is down, laying by my driveway, but the post has not been moved. I can't imagine which genius she hired for the job.
Today, the guy came to do the Title 5 inspection for our septic system. You have to have this, to sell a home in Massachusetts. I can't say it failed, because after an hour and a half, the guy came to the door and said we have to hire someone to clear all of the trees in a very large area of the woods, so he can run the line up through the septic to check it. It sounds like BS. He said not the "big trees," just small ones... and he complained bitterly, that he "couldn't go up that hill one more time." I almost said, "Well,
you shouldn't have this job if you are out of shape," but I didn't! Texted DH, who is in Sweden and gave him the bad news. Just what I need, cutting trees down right when the leaves are falling off of the trees.

[Jolt]

Wow, all that "staging" stuff sounds crazy, I wouldn't like that either! It doesn't look like much of that is done around here, at least from what I am seeing online (thinking of buying a house this spring…because of a merger, my job is being transferred next month to a hospital 25 minutes away by car and that is a little too much of a commute for me to put up with long term, plus I will be done paying my student loans and ready to buy). Some of the places I have looked at photos of are obviously still being lived in (though spruced up for the pictures), others are empty. I do look forward to picking out a house and then setting it up the way I want it.