Trying to get back into this

[Crankin]

That voice in your head telling you negative stuff is often the culprit of bad feelings. The key is to not just stop it, but to replace it with some kind of positive visual, mantra, or saying that will help you be in the moment. LPH has good advice. A few years ago I had to build back up to my previous level of endurance. I did lots of errand rides, going to farm stands, and riding to appointments. I still rode on the weekends and occasional fitness rides during the week, but I had to enjoy the present of each ride. Those little miles added up. I also went to yoga classes. The key is to have realistic, but fun expectations.

[ny biker]

I don't have anything to add, except welcome back and good luck!

[NoNo]

Thanks for the encouragement! I asked my brother if he would ride with me, but apparently he doesn't even want to do short rides anymore. I have a friend getting a bike so we'll be able to ride soon. As for my mental state, it's going to be tough to block those negative thoughts. I guess the main thing is that I'm even trying in the first place. Today I hiked. I want to have a mix of activities so that I don't get burned out. Yesterday I did 10 very slow miles on the bike but I felt great when I was done. I just have to remember that feeling I guess and keep trying.

[ny biker]

Thanks for the encouragement! I asked my brother if he would ride with me, but apparently he doesn't even want to do short rides anymore. I have a friend getting a bike so we'll be able to ride soon. As for my mental state, it's going to be tough to block those negative thoughts. I guess the main thing is that I'm even trying in the first place. Today I hiked. I want to have a mix of activities so that I don't get burned out. Testator I did 10 very slow miles on the bike but I felt great when I was done. I just have to remember that feeling I guess and keep trying.

Yes, sometimes you just need to close your eyes and remind yourself how good you'll feel when you're done -- picture it in your mind.

While you're riding -- look around, enjoy the trees, flowers, wildlife, whatever, maybe sing a favorite song to yourself. Take the bike computer off your bike if the numbers distract you.

[Catrin]

Hi NoNo, I remember you! Welcome back!

I've had problems with serious PTSD so I know just how difficult it can be to deal with bad thoughts and feelings. Knowing that feelings aren't real doesn't much help in the midst of things. and, for me at least, setting out to block bad thoughts never worked well at all. What works better for me are those activities that require focus on the present moment - like cycling, mountain biking, tossing kettlebells around over my head, etc. If I weren't so afraid of heights I would have taken on rock climbing, it sounds like fun!

I like LPH's advice to mix up the riding and go different places/different types of riding than before. It is hard to shut up that inner voice that compares our current activity level/fitness with the past. Meander down scenic back country roads, go for grocery runs, ride in local parks. Focus on the scenery, breath deeply, enjoy the world around you.

[Crankin]

Blocking the negative thoughts is only the first step. Sometimes people don't hear or are not told the most important part, which is replacing the negative with the positive. How you do this is very personal. Some people use a mantra, some just repeat a saying in their head that isn't so "mantra-like," and others use visual images. You have to decide. As Catrin said, when you are riding, it is easier to focus on the visual spectacle of the environment. We really do see things on a bike that we miss otherwise. Same for hiking, or even walking.
Research shows that you can decrease anxiety/repetitive negative thoughts by using what's called 4-6 breathing 10X a day for one minute. This means inhaling for 4 breaths and exhaling for 6 breaths, slowly. The key is to always have the exhale be longer than the inhale. You can actually see changes in the frontal area of the brain on an f-MRI (forgive me, I forget which specific part) after a person has been practicing this for 4-6 weeks. Of course, it takes a commitment to do this, but it really works to bring down your overall level of anxiety and hypervigilance.
And, from my personal experience, mixing up activities is always best. It keeps us from physically over using the same muscles and joints, but also gives our brain the variety it craves.

[NoNo]

Hi Catrin! Thanks for the understanding. It's hard to describe the thoughts to other people, it's always nice to talk to someone that gets it. The good news is that even though I know I'm slower, I've come back from each ride in a great mood, proud of myself for getting out there. I may go tonight and then hike tomorrow. I definitely like the idea of mixing things up and not getting into a routine. Even with climbing I got burned out after a while (but man, was I strong!). I think the other thing I'm struggling with is how quickly this all happened. Last year at this time I was 30 lbs lighter and still had muscle. The mix of depression and meds packed on the weight and kept me from wanting to even get off the couch. I have a fairly good mix of meds now that allow me to get out and do things, but I'm not sleeping, so I'm also super tired. I may go and bike tonight, but that means I'll be asleep by 8. It's a trade-off, but I know each time I go out is a step towards improving my life and well-being.

Crankin, my psychiatrist is always pushing breathing techniques to me. When I was first diagnosed, everyone told me to do yoga, that it would calm me. Instead, I spent the whole time waiting for class to be over and generally not enjoying it. Still, I tried it. I think my mind races too much to really get into those quieting techniques. Maybe with more practice it would help, but I feel like I'm too high energy for that stuff. Next week I'm going to try cardio boxing! Tomorrow I'll hike. Variety will be my friend. I'm just grateful to even want to do this stuff, it's a far cry from where I was a few months ago.