Crazy Condo Neighbors

[Crankin]

The place I am referring to is not a retirement community, per se, in that there are no "activities," medical care, or different levels of living as you get near the end. It looks like any regular patio home/townhome development (of which there are scant few around here), but you have to be 55 and over to live there. Many move there while still working. This seems to be a growing trend. Ideally, I'd love to find a small ranch or Cape in west Concord, where I can walk to restuarants and a drug store (but not grocery, except a natural foods place). However, it is hard to find a house in that category that doesn't need major work and the cost is high. If we go one town over, I would be back in the regional community my kids grew up in, and there is a growing village center in one area that might work. I could walk to drug store, farm market, a couple of restaurants, yoga, and a whole bunch of new places. Depending where in this area I was, I could also walk to my doctor and major grocery store. I had a little nasty incident on my neighborhood list serve today, and I am quite ready to leave this town. It's nothing important, but I've never felt like I've belonged here, despite the fact I moved only 9 miles. After almost 10 years, it shouldn't be like this.

[Blueberry]

I'm not hesitating because of issues with the building or the HOA, just because I wouldn't want to make life frustrating for my neighbors. Said dog is an elder statesman and quite the gentleman. He has been approved everywhere we have asked. But he can walk heavily. And my cats run around and chase their toys.

We have outside riding space too - but I will have a potentially odd schedule for a while, and getting in some exercise inside is nice.

[shootingstar]

Said dog is an elder statesman and quite the gentleman. He has been approved everywhere we have asked. But he can walk heavily. And my cats run around and chase their toys.

I envision a cute homey scene at your end, Blueberry. No matter where you move.

[zoom-zoom]

This thread confirms that my "retirement dream" is a 1 story on an acre or two in the desert. No lawn/trees to maintain and no neighbors breathing down my neck. We're currently in an unmemorable subdivision (.25-.4 acre lots) with far too many nosey and cliquey people who are very concerned with keeping up appearances and I feel a not-too-subtle competitive vibe over who has the nicest house and the best cars (one look in our garage confirms that we would not win the car competition, but no one can hold a candle to our 2-wheeled collection, heh). The guy who bought the house next-door (and put it up for sale 6 months later) had his lot tilled...but the landscapers ignored lot lines and drove over at least half of the native wildflower seeds I'd planted the Summer before. He never planted an actual lawn and only about once/month mowed the weeds, so it's been a constant battle to keep his yard from encroaching on ours -- and I really loathe dealing with a lawn, much less even faster-growing weeds and the chemicals necessary to keep them from killing our grass and settling into my flower beds.

Yeah, I really find myself wanting to become a hermit more and more. DH feels the same way. We're both homebodies who are happy riding our bikes and vegging on the sofa in front of Netflix. The vast majority of our socialization involves other runners and cyclists.

[shootingstar]

This thread confirms that my "retirement dream" is a 1 story on an acre or two in the desert. No lawn/trees to maintain and no neighbors breathing down my neck. We're currently in an unmemorable subdivision (.25-.4 acre lots) with far too many nosey and cliquey people who are very concerned with keeping up appearances and I feel a not-too-subtle competitive vibe over who has the nicest house and the best cars (one look in our garage confirms that we would not win the car competition, but no one can hold a candle to our 2-wheeled collection, heh). The guy who bought the house next-door (and put it up for sale 6 months later) had his lot tilled...but the landscapers ignored lot lines and drove over at least half of the native wildflower seeds I'd planted the Summer before. He never planted an actual lawn and only about once/month mowed the weeds, so it's been a constant battle to keep his yard from encroaching on ours -- and I really loathe dealing with a lawn, much less even faster-growing weeds and the chemicals necessary to keep them from killing our grass and settling into my flower beds.

Yeah, I really find myself wanting to become a hermit more and more. DH feels the same way. We're both homebodies who are happy riding our bikes and vegging on the sofa in front of Netflix. The vast majority of our socialization involves other runners and cyclists.

I like some of our condo board members..they are diligent. We also have a good staff member with the property management firm that our condo building pays annually for their services. You need a permanent good paid staff member from such a firm for this work.



We seriously have to face reality of our future: we will no longer be able to drive nor should we in our 80's and onward. It's just dangerous to others. It's easier to change our transportation habits now....even a life without bikes, one day.

Hey folks...I haven't cycled for past 2.5 months (and there's no snow right now) because of my recovery from head injury. We have no car (and not advisable to drive with a head injury). So I've been walking daily, building my strength, using transit. Bike will come later. And I'm not elderly and still working full-time. (But it freaks me out that I qualify for over 55 developments.) I walked to and from my doctor's office today. 2 days ago it was another 20 min. walk to physio or I could take transit train there in lousy weather.

If all else fails, a short taxi ride.


But we're hermits. We don't socialize...meaning visit homes of other condo owners in same building. We just say hi in elevator stuff. Honest in a multi-unit buildings there's less of that type of nosey, cliquey stuff. In my opinion where I've lived. And I've sensed, I've lived beside some good neighbours but just never made an effort to know them. Ok, by us. As long as one is a responsible owner and makes little noise most of the time.

I live in both nice neighbourhoods in both cities. May I remind people that actually having some retired but still active condo/townhouse owners, some people have just abit more time to care for stuff in general. In Toronto I lived in such a building.

Here where I live our community neighbour association has a board of which over 50% are retired people who had professional/management jobs or are university/college educated prior to retirement....so they make good public speakers, organizers and taking time to understand legal/development matters, think through complex issues, provide some evidence, and document some stuff.

[Crankin]

I have never been friends with neighbors, and I love to socialize. Well, I take that back, we are friends with the couple who used to share our driveway; they sold the house to their daughter and family, and while we have tried with them (they ride, etc), we actually have more in common with the parents, who are older than us. We had one neighbor in AZ we socialized with. It started out with more, but the other family got religion and wouldn't talk to us because we didn't celebrate Christmas, enough said there. But overall, not friends, but friendly, would do favors for neighbors in my last neighborhood, although they were a toned down version of the Stepford wives. I've never cared what people think, so it was fine. I see some of my ex neighbors in the grocery store or around town and they are friendly. The people where I live now are just clueless. The younger ones are totally helicopter parents and the older ones a bit too crunchy granola for me (that is being nice). I have my riding friends and my "regular" friends, and that is fine. I made the mistake of giving my opinion about something and I was given an "inappropriate" warning on the list serve, because I put out deer scram, an organic powder made of chili powder/ dried coyote urine, to keep the deer from eating my hostas! They didn't flame the ones who said they were all for the "culling of the herd," where we individually sign off to allow bow hunters on our property to shoot the deer, as we have a huge over population. Nor did anyone flame those who commented that all they got from deer was Lyme Disease. I suspect someone just doesn't like me, but since I no longer go to any neighborhood things, it seems weird.

[zoom-zoom]

Yeah, we have 2-3 couples/families in our 'hood that we really like, several families that we've never laid eyes on (we were one of the first homes built and have been here 2 years...several families have only been here a couple months). I suspect they're like us and value their privacy. Then the remainder (of about 22 homes) are sorta Desperate Housewives. Most of these families have kids that are significantly younger than our son, so we're in somewhat different places in life (though at least one family appears to view our 14 year old as a free babysitter, which doesn't sit well with me. The dad seemed actually put-out that once school started our son wasn't out hanging and supervising with the younger kids, but 8th graders have serious homework and school responsibilities, plus he was running cross country and busy with that).

And I think a lot of these folks went to school together, too -- definitely a feel that quite a few of these couples have known one-another for decades. When we have gone to neighborhood gatherings there's a pretty significant cliquey vibe coming from a particular group. We didn't grow up around here and avoid some of the local yokel drama.

[Trek420]

We seriously have to face reality of our future: we will no longer be able to drive nor should we in our 80's and onward. It's just dangerous to others. It's easier to change our transportation habits now....even a life without bikes, one day.

This. When we were house hunting I put Knot in charge of location because she knows the area. I got veto powers. I just had a few requirements, just a few;

Walkable to at least a few of the errands we run.
Near public transit options.
Bike able at least for as long as we're able to ride.
And if possible not a lot of stairs or single floor.
Dirt. At least some patch of dirt I can plant on, even small.

While walking the mutt we found a tiny condo that met all my non-negotiable demands. It's a short walk to stores, right on major bus lines and soon light rail will be close. There goes the anonymity of the Internet but we're right off the Burke Gillman so we can't be more walkable/bike able than that! Ground floor end unit gives me dirt on all 3 sides.

I believe it's best when choosing a place to live to factor aging options because we never know. Having worked in services for the disabled for a decade. Many do not plan to become disabled. Particularly I remember one conversation with a client saying "I was once like you. A high paying job, nice apartment and car, lots of activities and then this car crash happened." And there were so many who became disabled at work.

So I felt it worth considering as we looked that whether it's 6 weeks in a cast because I broke my leg skiing or a sudden permanent disability could I get to the bathroom if something happened? Could I get around when I decide not to drive?

So we're not leaving no matter how nuts my neighbor is. We found out that there was another owner she pushed out. Deeply religious she objected to the fact that this couple was living together unmarried. I don't know what happened but she harassed them to the point they sold and left.

We're married! What's her problem?

[Pax]

The criteria for our condo in FL was similar, zero stairs was a non negotiable for me and with this TKA I'm so glad we didn't waver on that. Our place is first floor, no stairs, walkable/bikeable to almost everything, and on the water. The water part was negotiable because of money but we lucked out.