Thread Drift

[Crankin]

Well, I guess I'd be screwed if I had a concussion, because if I had to lie around and rest, I'd go nuts, especially if I couldn't read. Oh, I'd have plenty of people who would offer to help, like the ones I spoke about, it's just they all seem to actually "want" to rush to these kinds of situations and help, which creeps me out. Then there's the committee from my synagogue who help those in need. Frankly, I'd rather die than have them come into my home. I didn't allow them to come to my mom's memorial observance, because it just felt so awkward. They are not my friends. And no one there even knows my dad died last summer. The best example I can give is after my mom died ( a few weeks had passed), I had a call from a woman who was one of my younger son's religious school teachers at some point. She felt the need to call me and help me "deal with my feelings," because her mom had also died in the past year. At first, I appreciated the call, as a nicety from someone I had a very tangential relationship with. Then, she would not get off of the phone. She barely knew me, let alone my mom, who lived in another state. I had a few calls like that, and I just felt totally like, "Why the hell are you calling me?" I know i deal with death, illness, and other bad things very pragmatically, plow on through, and I do not get sad very often, but it works for me. I am not unfeeling, and my mom was too young to die, but she had been sick for years and I knew it would happen. This might seem opposite of my comments of wanting more friends, but I find that the older I get, the more people just are talking about this stuff way too much. I think I am just very private about this stuff and I know people misinterpret it.
Shooting Star, you are lucky to have your partner there and a sister who can give you medical advice. I have a friend in AZ, who did that for me a few years ago, when I had all of my mystery medical stuff. A few phone calls to her made me feel better.