Not a party person - anybody else?

[thekarens]

I hate parties, weddings, baby showers. I much prefer to go out with a small group of people. I hate large groups.

[Dogmama]

I hate parties, weddings, baby showers. I much prefer to go out with a small group of people. I hate large groups.

What she said.

[rocknrollgirl]

OMG, I thought was all alone in my dislike of this type of social interaction. I love spending time with friends in small groups, anything other than that...blech. And work parties....no way, nope, never, not gonna do it.

[Crankin]

I have no problem socializing in groups, large or small. However, I am no longer "friends" with people I work with. I used to have a lot of close friendships with co-workers when I was teaching. We went out as friends, and sometimes with our significant others. I have hosted a few holiday parties at my home.
At my last job, there were a couple of get togethers that I did not attend, because they were far away from where I live, or involved stuff I would not do, like paintball. I am also very careful with my time, so I only go to stuff I know I will like.
DH's company stopped having holiday parties that include your significant other; however we do, some years, go to a weekend up in NH they sponsor for all employees. Over the years, we have totally eliminated going to any of the things that they sponsor during the weekend, including the Saturday night dinner. We take advantage of the free weekend at the Mt Washington Hotel, ride, hike, and go to restaurants we have discovered from our winter trips to the area. No one bothers us, there's no business related requirements to the weekend, although people tend to be nice, since DH has a visible position in the company.
I don't mind weddings (haven't been to one since my son's wedding), but baby showers and some bridal showers just piss me off, with all of those stupid, cutesy "games." I know that modern couples often have mixed gender showers, so perhaps this has changed since I was in my 20s/30s.
As far as the experience Shooting Star mentioned, I have also been in situations where DH and I felt totally ignored. One year, we went to the CRW holiday party (one of the bike clubs I belong to). This is not the club I lead for, but I know many people. I guess these people must socialize outside of riding, or at the least, they spend a lot of time riding together. There's a lot of cross over between this group and members of AMC. We left after about an hour.
But overall, I am very social, I rarely feel awkward, and while I like my quiet time in the country setting I live in, I get antsy if I go too long without "plans."

[Pax]

Crankin, this says it all in a nutshell for me "I am also very careful with my time, so I only go to stuff I know I will like"; one of the joys of middle age, for me, is I pretty much do want I want, when I want. I still HAVE to work, but I don't have to do other things I don't enjoy.

[Jolt]

For me it depends on the party...smaller get togethers or parties with friends are fun, even work parties b/c I like the people I work with, but loud crowded parties and those where I don't know anyone stress me out. For example, last night was the post-race party after the half-marathon I ran. It was being held at a local restaurant/bar and I decided to go check it out. Well, I walked in and turned around and walked right back out! The place was just packed wall to wall with people, the music was ear splittingly loud and I didn't know anyone else there anyway. Not my scene.

[Catrin]

I've never been much for parties, and these days I don't get invited much anyway. When I DO go, I generally wind up wishing I was home with a good book or movie. I generally wind up hanging out with a couple of people there, and am the 2nd person to go home. Parties just aren't my thing. I CAN be very social, but there is something about the party atmosphere that turns me into a wallflower...

[AppleTree]

I hate parties, weddings, baby showers. I much prefer to go out with a small group of people. I hate large groups.

Also agree with this sentiment! I loathe being invited to an event where the main objective is to stand around with a drink in your hand and try to make conversation with strangers. I can be outgoing and friendly, I sometimes work in positions where this is required. A friend of mine came up with the term "closet introvert", and I thought it was unique, but you can google that term and get a lot of links to blogs on that subject, ha. I enjoy the small groups I'm involved in, quilting and bicycling volunteer groups...but big events...dreadful. I can do it, but it depletes me.

[ny biker]

Re: weddings and showers, it all depends on who is getting married or having a kid. I'm looking forward to my cousin's wedding in a few weeks, because I like spending time with my family. I was happy to receive a save the date card for another cousin's wedding, because they're one of the relatives I don't get to see very often and I'm looking forward to catching up with their immediate family.

Large events are usually fine if there will be a few people there that I know and like. I have never liked parties where I only know one person -- I find it very hard to get conversations going with people in that situation.

When I was younger, I looked forward to parties as a way to possibly meet a nice guy who I might want to date and would be interested in dating me. That never happened. I met some nice people, some of them men, but nothing ever developed with them. Eventually I gave up.

[shootingstar]

Just my immediate family with their spouses and children = 20 people. So what is "big" can be "small" or normal to someone else. I enjoy dinner-party together. Sadly, we won't be able to do it.. So a family party I've always enjoyed and treasured. But then, we have family members that don't detest one another.

Last time I went to a wedding shower or baby shower was well over 25 yrs. ago. I've moved twice and lived in 3 different Canadian provinces. Those who I care for and would go (despite, I agree, cutesy annoying games at the event), are spread out all over Canada. It ends up being the wedding itself or seeing the baby long (months or years), after birth.

I've never been invited/invited myself to a wedding/baby shower for work colleagues at work (because that's the event site where they have been)....95% of them, I don't know them much at all. I've worked for over 9 different employers in past 30 years. So I reached a point a long time ago, being selective who I want to socialize, even if superficially. Once I leave the employer, in most cases, those acquaintances are no longer part of my radar. It's just the way it is...

As for cycling acquaintances, it helps to know a few faces. Deepest friendships I have ..are those who know me well enough, outside of cycling activities/events.

The right parties are great for creating positive vibes or wishing a loved one well.

[azfiddle]

Fortunately, most of the parties I get invited to are music parties where we sit around and play music. In fact, for a long time, ALL the parties I went to were music parties and I felt very strange going to parties that were just "sit around and talk" parties.

I enjoy having dinner with a small group but not parties with a lot of people I don't know.