Saying nothing, not doing much is abit difficult

[Veronica]

Mental illness is another area where we, the members of the judging society, believe that sufferers should just "buck up" and stop being like that.

It's funny, I use to think that. In my egocentricity (in my 20s mind you!), I assumed that if I didn't need "help" given my horrendous childhood, no one did. People were just being wimpy. As my horizons broadened, I learned that there's a lot more that goes on in the brain and contributes to mental health besides having an abusive childhood! I have often wished that I could bottle my resiliency and hand it on to some of my students.

Veronica

[malkin]

Sign me up for a big bottle of your resiliency potion when you get it worked out, ok?
Better yet, I'd sign up for a weekly home delivery like the milkman used to bring!

[salsabike]

Malkin, given your comment above, I thought you might find this interesting. A breathtaking 11-minute TED talk from 19-year-old comic Kevin Breel about what it's like to live with depression--not something very responsive to the "buck up" approach to mental health. http://video-subtitle.tedcdn.com/tal...3X-480p-en.mp4

I have read some articles lately about mental health programs that are specifically designed to teach people ongoing coping skills directly related to their mental health symptoms, and some of that sounds very promising.

[Aromig]

I want some of Veronica's bottled resiliency too! Just reading some of your day to day struggles in your job makes me realize my hard clients aren't nearly as hard!

I post every so often, but I read here a lot. This is one of the most interesting threads I've ever read. I'm overweight. When I work really really really hard I can lose weight, but I'll likely never be skinny. I am very active, and can do nearly any physical activity I want to. To me, that's what is important -- functional fitness. I can't say much though, because I do love drinking beers after work with my colleagues and I like cheese. It's funny -- for the most part I eat healthy but I feel like I need to apologize for that one cheese and fruit tray we might order once a month because I am overweight.

I know that a lot of health issues are linked with obesity, at least sortof. Most research shows that those health issues are linked more to activity level than weight, but then again weight sometimes has some correlation to activity as well (although its not perfectly correlated in everyone).

I am involved in management of the small business with which I am affiliated and we're always making decisions about how to impact our healthcare costs. Last year we contemplated increasing the percentage of premiums employees paid if (1) they smoked and (2) they were obese according to BMI. The argument was that obesity increases health costs so those who incur the most costs should pay the most. I was horrified -- I really don't have many health issues (well, unless you count some physical therapy from accidents from being active) so it isn't an exact correlation. I know several very thin people at our work that aren't active at all and eat all of the same things I do but their BMI isn't in the obese or overweight range and they have severe health issues. At this time we haven't increased premiums based upon BMI, and we are working to get people more active.

Since I am overweight, people are surprised to learn that I bike and/or run an average of 9-10 hours each week (in a recent work contest to encourage people to increase their activity levels -- it turns out I'm one of the most active). It's funny that the people at work who are closest to me (and know how active I am) are surprised when I say things like "I'd have to pay extra premium if we institute that policy" because once they KNOW me, they don't see me as overweight anymore, in part because I think they are seeing me with their heart rather than with their eyes.

So when I read the opening post to this thread, I read a judgmental tone. Then again, I probably brought my own baggage and defensiveness, because I do know that we judge people by what we see with the preconceived notions about overweight means. I agree that weight does bear some relationship to activity and/or diet -- but I also know that its just a relationship, its not a perfect correlation and depending on which side of the scale you fall on it might mean something different to you.

I've babbled a bit, but I guess I really just wanted to say that I love where this thread went. You women are amazing, and understanding, and critical-thinking and smart and I'm looking forward to where this thread goes on mental health (because I think the stigmatism for mental health issues is similar and we're just now figuring out that its not as simple as we think and that until you've walked a mile in someone's shoes you just might not know what its like).

Amy

[malkin]

...for the most part I eat healthy but I feel like I need to apologize for that one cheese and fruit tray we might order once a month because I am overweight...

Cheese and fruit?
Really?

[OakLeaf]

... which is exactly what she means about the way fat or even less-than-thin people are publicly judged in our culture. Hopefully Aromig doesn't beat herself up for eating a nice plate of cheese and fruit, but odds are that between the store and her house, some total stranger will be cutting their eyes at her or even, as Blueberry described, making comments to her about sugar and fat. That's why this stuff makes me so angry.