Thread Drift

[Pax]

Thanks. I miss her so much. Mom was 91 years old, she was dressed and ready to go raise holy heck at a meeting with her progressive activist friends when she suddenly passed. When her friend arrived and Mom did not respond to the door, her friend called my brother who lives nearby. Since she had a heart aneurism it was instant. The day after, Knott and I jetted down to see my brother and SIL. The house was all in order and Mom had plants she'd got at the farm market and ready to go into the garden; mostly basil starts. I guess we all should be so lucky, active, independent and gardening right to the end.

Wow, your mom sounds like such a cool lady. And you're right, we should all be so lucky; my mom was one of those who got sicker and sicker and ended up having a miserable last few years.

I wanna go out like your mom.

[Trek420]

Me too. We don't always get those choices. She was diagnosed with the aortic aneurism years back. The doc advised surgery. This would have her in rehab for a year. Close to 90 at the time she decided to just keep going, always with the specter that she could go at any moment rather than a year or more in rehab with no certainty that she'd be independent after. I think I'd choose the same.

I'll never be as sharp as her, my Mom was brilliant. But if you want to live like her start gardening, doing The Nation crossword puzzles to keep the body and brain sharp. Find causes you're passionate about and raise heck with your lefty friends. Maybe a demonstration every so often.

Other than that luck and genes I guess.

[emily_in_nc]

Trek, your mom sounds like a wonderful, intelligent woman who embraced life to the fullest. I hope to be just like her when I'm "old". And like others have said, we should all be so lucky to go quickly like that without years of misery and poor health as so many are faced with, or dying in the hospital.

Still, condolences are in order. I don't care how old she was or how she died, it HURTS to lose a parent. Hugs and warm thoughts coming your way...

[Pax]

Still, condolences are in order. I don't care how old she was or how she died, it HURTS to lose a parent. Hugs and warm thoughts coming your way...

Amen sister, the first dozen people who told me "your mom lived a long life" almost got whacked. Who are they to say how long a life should be, she wanted to stick around, she was not done yet. Those sorts of sentiments are diminishing.

[salsabike]

Trek, your mom does sound wonderful. You have all my sympathy for losing her. Mine went in 2006 and I miss both of my parents every day.

[Pax]

Had to meet my brother this evening at my moms place, theres a guy coming tomorrow to look over her belongings and make an offer to buy the lot. When I got there her stuff was laid out all over the place so it could be more easily viewed... that was so hard, I could look at a coffee mug and know I'd bought it for her for Mother's Day 10 years ago, a book we picked out at the local library book sale, and on and on. It was so hard.

I just want to leave for Florida and find a reset button some how, a break, a chance to heal and catch my breath.

[emily_in_nc]

Had to meet my brother this evening at my moms place, theres a guy coming tomorrow to look over her belongings and make an offer to buy the lot. When I got there her stuff was laid out all over the place so it could be more easily viewed... that was so hard, I could look at a coffee mug and know I'd bought it for her for Mother's Day 10 years ago, a book we picked out at the local library book sale, and on and on. It was so hard.

I just want to leave for Florida and find a reset button some how, a break, a chance to heal and catch my breath.

I can't even imagine that, Pax. I know someday that same time will come for me. Since I'm the oldest and the only daughter, I'll be the one in charge of "the sale". My younger brother is awesome, but he's not exactly Mr. Responsible. I dread it sooooo much. My mom was an only child, so she has so many things of my grandparents and even great-grandparents...and I can't begin to keep it all or even more than a tiny % of it. It is going to be SO hard, so emotional. Thinking of you as you go through this horrible rite of adulthood...