Fear & age?

[Grits]

I prefer to think I am more cautious, not fearful! With me, it comes directly from having done this long enough to see what can happen when cyclists are careless, and also what can happen through absolutely no fault of their own. Having been involved in a crash due to some poor cycling habits of others and ending up with a broken bone, I know how quickly an accident can happen and how long it can take to recover from it. As a result, I no longer participate in charity rides where I have to start out with hundreds of other riders all bunched up together (and then remain bunched up until the first rest stop). I still participate in smaller charity rides and just stay out of any packs of riders. Sure, it is fear of another crash, but it is also common sense on practical ways to avoid a crash. There are enough rides out there that I don't feel like I have deprived myself of anything, I have just made a choice to support smaller rides. I think caution -and wisdom- come with age. The only answer I know of is to take the precautions you realistically can and still do the activities you enjoy. Not always an easy balance to achieve. I'm interested in hearing from others.

[Blueberry]

With me, it comes directly from having done this long enough to see what can happen when cyclists are careless, and also what can happen through absolutely no fault of their own. Having been involved in a crash due to some poor cycling habits of others and ending up with a broken bone, I know how quickly an accident can happen and how long it can take to recover from it. As a result, I no longer participate in charity rides where I have to start out with hundreds of other riders all bunched up together (and then remain bunched up until the first rest stop). I still participate in smaller charity rides and just stay out of any packs of riders.

This too. As you might know, I had a long-standing shoulder injury resulting from the same charity ride where you were injured. Someone didn't see 1) the stop light, 2) the fact that I was stopped or 3) the car in front of me stopped, and literally grabbed my arm to stop herself - taking down me and a few other people (and separating the AC joint where she grabbed the arm). We will never do that ride again (or others that attract new riders who do not know what they are doing).

[rebeccaC]

I like being scared and the sensory experience that my body is put through…..but then you are probably thinking more about anxiety/fear. I remember having more anxiety in my early independent adulthood than now just a few years from that. Yoga and meditation helps me with anxiety. If I let a fear go into a longer pattern it will increase so maybe it can also become more of an issue as we get older if we don’t deal with it. I’ve learned to test a fear to see if it really is as bad as I think and that can lead to my finding ways to manage, lessen and even eliminate it. Exercise, healthy eating, relaxation and my spiritual faith helps greatly with these kinds of things.

now, caution as a calculated response to a danger shouldn't be age related in my mind…..

[Pax]

Oh my. I'm going thru the same sort of thing right now. When I go out for a ride I worry about the cars on the road much more than I used to, or I worry that I'll be in a dumb solo crash. When Lee goes out for a ride I wonder if I'll get one of those dreaded phone calls. Even when we're out driving, I wonder what might happen. It's not really in the forefront of my mind, but it's definitely there.

I think a large part of it has to do with the fact that up until a couple of months ago our day-to-day existence revolved around my elderly FIL who was in & out & in & out of hospitals and nursing homes, so I was constantly reminded of what life could become.

I'm hoping that, now that my FIL has passed away and we no longer have to be prepped for when the next call comes, I'll get away from this mindset.

I'm 53 and in this same boat, not only did I have to have my fifth right knee surgery after slipping on the ice a couple of years ago, I also take care of my mom. Same as your FIL, she's very sick and watching her fail has been painfully enlightening, it makes me realize how hard aging and illness can impact a person.

It's caused my wife and to make some significant changes, we've sold our house and moved to an apartment to get away from stairs and our long icy driveway, and we no longer plan to retire in IL. We are searching for a place in the sun... it cracks us up when people tell us how hot the desert is (I've lived in the desert three times in my life), I reply "you never have to shovel or slip on heat".

[roo4]

Mid-40s here. I am more cautious about many things in life. I think the trigger was having a child. In answer to your specific questions, I think becoming more cautious is related to experience--seeing bad stuff happening to people we know. There may also be some hormonal changes--I'm thinking about risk taking behavior as a mating strategy, particularly for young males (note that I am totally making that up and have no scientific documentation to provide). What can we do about it? Well, you have to find balance. Don't sled on the same hills that you plunged down 20 years ago. Pick something tamer. Who cares? As long as you are having fun and staying safe, I don't think it matters if you slow down a bit.

[Veronica]

I fell down a cliff in 2007 while mountain biking. I had gotten so skittish on my mountain bike that I walked some downhill sections of the White Rim Trail - a pretty easy trail. We did a clinic in Crested Butte this summer - that ended up being more like a private tour. The feedback from the guides and a new bike has given me back much of my confidence. My brain still freaks out sometimes, but it seems a more "rational" freak out now.

I have never really liked road riding with large groups - too many people who either don't obey the rules, or just have poor bike handling skills.

Veronica

[jobob]

I have never really liked road riding with large groups - too many people who either don't obey the rules, or just have poor bike handling skills.
Veronica

Likewize, I have no desire anymore to go on a large group ride. And my definition of large is getting smaller all the time.

[malkin]

There was an incident locally last year where a cyclist was STOPPED at a rail crossing. He was hit by a car, pushed on to the tracks and killed by the train.

You bet I'm scared.

[Eden]

I think there are a couple of things that happen as you get older

1 - you realize you are not invincible and you've probably had the experience of having an incident or two yourself or having someone you know well be injured or die. It brings it home.

2 - you realize that as you age it really, actually is easier to get hurt and takes a lot longer to recover…. I have certainly noticed that I don't bounce off the ground without a scratch as much these days… and I'm now also probably paying the piper a bit for things that happened in the past. It makes me more cautious.

3 - you inner ear ages as well - I am personally *much*, *much* less tolerant of things that whirl, spin or shake my head a lot. I get dizzy and disoriented more easily than I did when I was a kid. I'm not even interested in mountain biking because I feel like bumping down hill really fast I cannot see well enough or react well enough to be safe…

[Melalvai]

These are great responses, thanks!

1 - you realize you are not invincible and you've probably had the experience of having an incident or two yourself or having someone you know well be injured or die. It brings it home.

Good point. My daughter's wreck in 2010, and my cousin's little girl's death a few years before that, were strong blows to my confidence. I didn't make the connection because what does sledding have to do with bicycling? But I realize that I've heard some things about sledding that connect it in my mind to my daughter's wreck. A popular sledding hill here in town, that we used to sled on when my daughter was small, was closed down because someone was killed on it. A friend of mine commented that she won't go sledding herself because she did her ER rotation during the winter and saw a lot of broken faces from sledding. I guess those things stewed in my mind and connected with my daughter's wreck and now I'm not comfortable sledding.

It's not at all logical because I don't mind HER sledding, I just am not comfortable doing it myself.

3 - you inner ear ages as well - I am personally *much*, *much* less tolerant of things that whirl, spin or shake my head a lot. I get dizzy and disoriented more easily than I did when I was a kid. I'm not even interested in mountain biking because I feel like bumping down hill really fast I cannot see well enough or react well enough to be safe…

Oh! That is so true. I hadn't realized it was a physiological change but now that you mention it I see it. My daughter & I went to the park not long ago, and swung on the swings & climbed on things etc. (She's 18...we had a blast!) I did not swing as high as she did or as high as I used to. I didn't like the merry-go-round at all. I can get vertigo so much more easily than when I was younger.

[Crankin]

I've always been cautious and at times, fearful. I come from a family of fearful, neurotic Jewish women, and I've broken through most of that... that said, my mom was adventurous, but born at the wrong time. She was very athletic, and she really only put it to use in high school, in the 1940s. I just wish I had started outdoor stuff earlier, because I think I would have had less fear in my 20s or 30s. I don't have particularly great bike handling skills on downhills, and at this point, I am not sure what else to do. It scares the crap out of me. The other parts, well, I *am* a bike trip leader, so I try to mitigate danger by planning routes that don't have awful intersections, uphill stops, etc. You probably wouldn't notice anything bad about my riding unless you saw me descending! I also no longer do big group rides, and I even don't like riding with "my" group sometimes because of the incredibly poor skills. This is why I volunteer to be the sweep a lot of times! I don't like the unknown and I do get anxious if I am on a group ride and try to anticipate what I will have to be doing. I am better than I used to be, though. I have no issues taking the lane, signaling, etc, but within the confines of my familiar area or in other suburban/rural roads.
I will ride just about anywhere around where I live and I like climbing. However, I couldn't ride in Boston. I don't even drive in Boston. Too many azzholes and things I can't control.
I am less scared when I am nordic skiing. I descend pretty big hills on those skinny skis. Maybe because it's closer to the ground and snow is softer than pavement. However, today, there was a lot of ice at the beginning of our ski, on a small descent and my legs started shaking uncontrollably, I guess because I was scared. It made it very hard to descend with my knees together, but I got down without falling.
I have osteoporosis that is being treated and I am back into the osteopeinia range now. But, it makes me more cautious. Really, though, my fear is mental and somehow, I have been able to work through in skiing, not so much in cycling. At the end of the day, though, I feel like Shooting Star. I am out there doing what 99% of other 60year olds don't do.

[smilingcat]

maybe its the accumulated ouchies that makes us more reserved and play more cautiously.

We also realize that we don't heal as fast as when we were younger. My shattered collar bone back in my late 20's healed in about 8 weeks. took another month to regain strength in the bone but still a very fast healing. I shattered my other good collar bone in solo accident, I was in my mid 40's at the time. That took 4 month for the bone to mend and another 2 maybe 3 month to regain any strength in the bone...

My injuries are definitely taking lot longer to heal as I get older... Torn knee in my teens, I'm not sure if it would heal at all today. It might fuse together instead...
And my reaction time is about three times slower than in my teens.

So I'm slower, play it safe but I'm here, know who I am, and I'm happy about it. I got my yahoos way out of my system before I reached 20. Now I just watch and go "that's really gonna hurt".

I think its called getting wiser as we age.

[malkin]

maybe its the accumulated ouchies that makes us more reserved and play more cautiously....

I think its called getting wiser as we age.

Years ago, my brother described an old woman walking "like she'd already stubbed every toe, and knew how it felt."

[Skippyak]

The older we get, the more we cling to life. I am still more fearful skiing than I am cycling though. It is not rational. I am more than irritated by my skiing limitations.

[OakLeaf]

The older we get, the more we cling to life.

I've been saying that for decades, and you're the first person I've ever "met" who agrees with me! It's such a truism that "young people think they're immortal," where I believe it's the exact opposite - young people expect to die at any minute, so they can be more willing to take risks; older people gain this emotional conviction that since death hasn't happened to them yet, it isn't going to, and if they can just make their lives a little smaller and a little more unpleasant, they can last forever.

I try very, very hard not to do that. There's one thing that terrifies me above all else, and that is medical procedures. That is definitely a case where experience led to the terror. So I've tightened up my paperwork and prepared myself for hard decisions as best I can, knowing it might not be enough.

As far as two-wheeled exploits, it's being off the bikes because of injuries that has made me somewhat more tentative, not the injuries themselves (which mostly didn't happen on two wheels anyway). I ride fewer miles, my skills get rusty, and that eats at my confidence ... as it very well should IMO. I completely lost all confidence at low-speed maneuvers a while back, and that's been a HUGE mental block, but I don't attribute that to age at all (though I'm not entirely sure what to attribute it to ... I'd had enough low-speed tipovers before that that *didn't* much hurt my confidence ...)