Dear So and So

[Owlie]

Dear face--
Please stop hurting. Barring that, please be something like a sinus infection or unhappy gums or from me clenching my jaw so much. I have prescription drug coverage. I don't have dental insurance any more. I can't afford for you to be a toothache or something resulting from that a cracked filling (which already happened once this summer).

[Eden]

Dear thieving jerk... please keep your sticky little fingers out of my garden. I worked very hard to plant all that and your stealing my first (and perhaps only...) nicely orange bell pepper doesn't exactly make my day.. My front yard is not a grocery store, a garden center (to you whom has in the past stolen my flowers and pots) or a furniture store (my nice little lounger).... stay out of my yard!!

[malkin]

Dear thieving jerk... please keep your sticky little fingers out of my garden. I worked very hard to plant all that and your stealing my first (and perhaps only...) nicely orange bell pepper doesn't exactly make my day.. My front yard is not a grocery store, a garden center (to you whom has in the past stolen my flowers and pots) or a furniture store (my nice little lounger).... stay out of my yard!!

Amen to that!
Last year someone stole our funky little windmill/light from Ikea. People take produce and rip flowers out all the time. Last week some ladies in scrubs pushing wheelchairs/patients from a neighborhood care facility came to the door to confess that they had taken tomatoes previously and could they please have more. I was busy dealing with a problem and late-for-work and on the phone, so I was super-annoyed. In retrospect it is just rather puzzling behavior.

If we can garden, so can you!!

[Eden]

They had the unmitigated gall to ask for *more*!!!!

[Fredwina]

some folks will steal anything:
http://www.timesunion.com/local/arti...ed-4885784.php

[Pax]

Dear friends and colleagues,

Yes, we own a truck. A lovely Nissan four door truck, it is our only vehicle... please stop asking to borrow it!!! If you need to move grandmas dresser rent a Uhaul, it's only $19 a day. How would you feel if I asked to borrow your very nice Lexus for this evening since were going to the symphony and it would be a nicer choice for a dressy occasion??

Signed,

Buy you own!

[kajero]

Dear friends and colleagues,

Yes, we own a truck. A lovely Nissan four door truck, it is our only vehicle... please stop asking to borrow it!!! If you need to move grandmas dresser rent a Uhaul, it's only $19 a day. How would you feel if I asked to borrow your very nice Lexus for this evening since were going to the symphony and it would be a nicer choice for a dressy occasion??

Signed,

Buy you own!

My daughter had that issue. She finally decided to tell them they could, but she would appreciate it they paid the same rental fee as the U-Haul as well as return it with a full tank of gas. (And she always made sure the tank was nearly empty) Funny, she lost "friends" that she never liked anyway and others knew better than to ask.