((((((Blueberry))))))

I'm so sorry about your friend.

I'm struggling to get back on my bike too, and at this point the emotional barriers are definitely higher than the physical ones. I think Indy is right, there's a point where you just have to make yourself get out there. I'm driving up in the morning to do part of the club ride - as much as I hate driving farther than I'm planning to ride, just having it on the schedule is a way of making myself go for a ride. And even though I'll still be doing half of it by myself, half of a ride with friends is worth it to me.

I'm lucky in that being way out of shape actually makes me more compatible with this particular club. Can you maybe find a slower club ride than you're accustomed to, so you won't feel bad about your conditioning trying to ride with your usual riding buddies?