In early July, a close friend and neighbor of mine was killed while on his bike by a hit and run driver. The driver was arrested the next day, had 2 pending DWI charges (from other dates - we don't know whether he was drunk when he killed my friend), and is still in jail awaiting trial/a plea/etc. The hit and run (I *refuse* to call it an accident) occurred less than a mile from my house (though on a road I usually do not ride).

It took me until this week to be able to get back on a bike *at all* other than on a trainer. I finally went for an outside ride a few days ago (short). But - last night, DH has a scary incident with a driver about half a mile from our house (she passed him with about 6 inches of room in a neck down on the road). We called the police, and they talked to her (since she lives about 3 blocks away). They also gave her a parking ticket since she was parked illegally when they found the vehicle. But - there's not a report of any kind - which is scary because these neck downs are being put in *all over* our area and they are very scary for cyclists (a whole 'nother issue).

But....the whole thing has left me 1) out of shape and 2) extremely skittish about riding. I have no idea where to even start with building up my outside riding (since my trainer miles don't seem to have done as much as I thought they would). I also don't quite know how to get my mind to stop with the "what if's" while I'm riding. I love it and believe in it too much to just give it up. Thankfully, the motions/bike handling/etc. are find. It's just the mental and out of shape physical aspects. A friend made the comment to me that he would be sad if I never rode again because it's so much of who I am. He was right. That's what got me back out there at all. Any suggestions? Words of wisdom?