I have to admit this reads like a first world problem. I suppose it all started when your card was overcharged and it gave a sour taste to what is meant to be one of the best things ever

Now, you seem to be comparing bike geometry by real life measurements. That means nothing irl. The geometry differences seem minuscule on paper, but good geometry goes a long way. And you will only know if it's a good geometry for you once you get some longer rides in.

As for the stem, if you didn't like the deal, you could have bought another and kept the original to sell online or something. But a $25 extra for a different stem doesn't seem bad to me, especially if it's not the same model.