I contacted a seller on Etsy that does custom bike bells and will see what he can do. He will probably think I am nuts.
MTA: ordered and done. Promise to post photos of the bike and the wacky bell when I have them! 
MTAx2: A second LBS I had emailed just responded and also said my Pure was not able to be upgrade with a front derailler. He also said the Shift that my local LBS recommended is not a CF design - just very upright/relaxed. He said Electra makes nice CF bikes but they didn't have any. Given I didn't mention Electra in my original email to him asking about adding gears to the Pure, and given he doesn't even sell Electras, I figure that is good karma for me.
Last edited by Kerry1976; 05-29-2013 at 11:59 AM.
200x Electra Townie 24D/Brooks B67