Deep Depression

[VeganBikeChick]

Just wanted to update and let everyone know I got my old job in Seattle back! I start in 2 weeks. Now the packing begins...who wants to pack for me?

[OakLeaf]

Great news! Hope the move goes smoothly.

[limewave]

I hope that you are able to find balance and that hope, joy and motivation soon return to you!
There is some great input and advice here. I'd like to share my personal experience if that's alright. I have suffered from depression since the onset of puberty, at times it has been very severe and totally debilitating. I thought it was because of so many things--home life, friends, relationships, situational, etc. And then I thought it might be chemical. I was finally put on a prescription anti-depressant in my early 20's. That really helped. Although I wasn't thrilled with the knowledge I would have to be on antidepressants the rest of my life. Eventually I started going to a naturapathic doctor. And she suggested my depression was from hormonal imbalance. Through changing my diet and supplementing occasionally with vitamins and minerals, we have been able to manage my depression in a natural way that has far better results than the prescription drug. It's truly amazing.

There are times when I have debilitating anxiety--you mentioned having fear of being alone and that's why I'm bringing this up. There was a day where I had overwhelming anxiety and fear of being in an accident, it was so great that I pulled over to the side of the road and I had to have someone come pick me up. A coworker of mine, mother of two kids about my children's age, was killed the week before in a terribly accident. Being unable to manage and rationalize fear and anxiety is a symptom of the adrenal system under duress.

What I've learned is that depression and anxiety are not things that we have to live with on a constant basis. There is help out there. We all experience sadness and anxiety/worry because of changes in our lives or circumstance. But when those feelings become so big they overtake our lives--that's a symptom of an imbalance in our bodies. A doctor is invaluable in diagnosis and resolving these imbalances.

Hugs to you!

[VeganBikeChick]

Thanks so much for your insight, limewave. It's so appreciated.

I'd much rather go a natural route than using medications, and naturopaths are much more available to me after I move back. For now I am on a low-dose antidepressant that I just started a week and a half ago. I don't feel like my depression is any better yet, but realize that meds take time to work.

I think being around my friends, who are my support network, will be an invaluable resource to me as I heal from this difficult time in my life. And my mother is helping me move back to Seattle, so having her for support will also be helpful. On the plus side, I've been getting lots of compliments at work on my weight loss - I call it the "heartbreak hotel" diet.

Once again, I can't thank the ladies of TE enough for all the support and encouragement you've given me. You've really helped me navigate these rough waters.

[indysteel]

Thanks for sharing your experience, Limewave (and so good to see you; we've missed you).

Interestingly, I have an appointment with a nurse practitioner in mid-June to see where I am hormonally. While my primary intention is to talk to her about the hormonal changes I've noted over the last few years that are likely a combination of autoimmune thyroid disease and perimenopause, I have a feeling that we'll touch on mood in general. Ever since Jiffer started posting about it a couple of years ago, I've been curious about what role, if any, my adrenal glands might be playing in my thyroid disease. I'll keep your comments in mind, too.

VBC, I'm glad you're taking some really good steps toward wellness. We're always here for you if and when you want to "chat" about any of this.

[VeganBikeChick]

Hi Ladies,

Wanted to share that I'm back in Seattle. Still going through a really rough transition. I miss the ex-boyfriend with all my heart and am having serious doubts about having moved back, but it is what it is. On the bright side, it's awesome to be back at my old job and have so many people welcome me back with open arms. I have things to do with my girlfriends.

Nights and mornings are the hardest - going to bed and waking up alone. In some respects I suppose I am grieving a death - the death of a relationship that meant the world to me. Everyone keeps saying it'll get better, but it really hasn't yet. I just want to be back to my old independent self.

It does feel good to be back on the bike again : )

[OakLeaf]

((((((VBC)))))) Hang in there. You've made a big transition and it's natural to have regrets and second thoughts. It *will* get better, I have no doubt. Glad you're riding - that makes everything better.