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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Oslo, Norway
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    4,066
    Aw, I'm sorry Indy. Isn't it amazing how we know people like this are impossible to deal with and we know to keep our distance and not get involved, and they STILL manage to **** up our heads. I guess that's what's empathy, voluntary or not, does to you...
    Winter riding is much less about badassery and much more about bundle-uppery. - malkin

    1995 Kona Cinder Cone commuterFrankenbike/Selle Italia SLR Lady Gel Flow
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  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    Concord, MA
    Posts
    13,394
    Indy, right now I am just trying to get her to stop self destructive behaviors. She just came out of the hospital. This is a case of neglect, abuse, family history, adoption, and attachment problems. Her adoptive mom is wonderful, but it's a horribly stressful situation for her. I practically live at their home... two 1.5-2 hour visits a week.
    You are right, most therapists avoid treating this diagnosis. it's a known "joke" in my profession. Especially psychiatrists, it seems. I've actually had a couple of clients who fit this description, although they were diagnosed as Bipolar Disorder.
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Central Indiana
    Posts
    6,034
    Yikes, Crankin. Your client certainly has all the triggers for BPD. How very sad. I hope you and her adoptive mom can make a difference. I've often wondered what might have happened if my sister had gotten help at some point in her adolescence or young adulthood.
    Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.

    --Mary Anne Radmacher

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Folsom CA
    Posts
    5,667
    A couple of years ago, I deliberately disengaged and eliminated all contact with my birth family. I thought I was very unusual in that respect, but perhaps I'm not.

    Hugs to you, Indy.

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  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Western Canada-prairies, mountain & ocean
    Posts
    6,984
    I slept like a log. I haven't slept deeply and through the night for last few months. But when it happens it's like drinking a deep long glass of water after a long hard bike ride. I didn't ride far yesterday since it started to snow. But did some art while playing some classical music.
    My Personal blog on cycling & other favourite passions.
    遙知馬力日久見人心 Over a long distance, you learn about the strength of your horse; over a long period of time, you get to know what’s in a person’s heart.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    perpetual traveler
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    1,267
    It is unsettling to me that there are therapists that avoid BPD or diagnose it as something else to avoid the issues the diagnoses brings. It feels like an oncologist who doesn't want to help people who have pancreatic cancer because it is too hard. I suppose if they are referring people to therapists that are better equipped that would be fine.

    My niece has BPD. She is tough to deal with and I take breaks. She also is bipolar. Her social worker believes that the BPD diagnosis is wrong. I think she believes that simply because of the baggage the diagnosis brings. We have had a few discussions and I think her social worker spends too much time trying to be my niece's friend rather than being a social worker. She wants to be on my niece's side and I think that colors her view of reality. The SW is very inexperienced. Once a week the SW picks up my niece and takes her out for coffee. I She doesn't go inside my niece's apartment. You can tell a lot just by seeing the current state of her apartment. She needs to see that to know that my niece's son is safe and being taken care of. I am blabbing about this because I think I need to talk to someone in charge. Her old social worker was excellent but she retired. Ah well.

    At least she has others on her mental health team.
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    Richard Feynman: “The first principle is that you must not fool yourself and you are the easiest person to fool.”

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Central Indiana
    Posts
    6,034
    My own therapist gave up treating BPDs because she found that CBT did not tend to help them. They also tended to exact a huge emotional toll on her, by the very nature of the disorder. A pancreatic cancer patient may be difficult for an oncologist to treat, but not in the same way as a BPD. The extreme love/hate poles that BPDs tend to fluctuate between can be extremely taxing, especially when combined with self injury.

    But it's really the first point that's worth emphasizing. CBT may not be the right treatment for BPDs. From what I've read, dialectical behavior therapy may be more effective, but not every therapist offers that type of therapy.
    Live with intention. Walk to the edge. Listen hard. Practice wellness. Play with abandon. Laugh. Choose with no regret. Continue to learn. Appreciate your friends. Do what you love. Live as if this is all there is.

    --Mary Anne Radmacher

 

 

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