I have found one group that I like, but even now, they often split into 2 groups on rides and I don't quite fit into either. It's a social ride group of mostly older people who can ride during the week. There's always a lunch afterwards, which I haven't been to in 2 years. As I sit here now, I am getting ready to go on my first ride with them this year; last year I only did one. So, the main group ends up averaging about 13, although they will ride along at 15-20. I climb better than most of these people and this is where they slow up. I deal with it, but they also use a "human arrowing" system which means if you ride near the front you have to be willing to take a turn sitting at a corner to guide the group and wait until the sweep passes to leave your spot. Then, you have to sprint to get back into the group. I don't mind doing this around here, but if we are riding on the north shore or up in NH, I don't like being out there, trying to catch up when I don't really know where I am. As some of the older people have slowed or left the group, a group of semi tough but nice guys have split off and often do a longer version of the ride, at a pace of about an average of 15-16. I can do the pace, but not for 50 miles at this point in my life. They have encouraged me to ride with them, but I am afraid I'll hold them back. So, I end up frustrated, with the slower group.
Today I just hope I can do the 34 mile base ride. There is an option for 23 relaxed miles, but I think I might get annoyed.
The thing here, no one is dropped, this is not a typical group ride. Some of these people have been riding together for 20+ years. I found out about the group when one of the guys came on a ride I led, when DH was in the hospital and he was impressed (I was stronger then!).