First Time on a Road Bike after Extensive Tour

[hirakukibou]

Thanks missjean for looking at the blog. It really was a horrible chapter. It was odd to be in the physical site -- very creepy.

Emily, I think I am going to try to ride the road bike today again. It is like learning to ride again!

[SheFly]

I just read about your re-entry, and the tragic events that preceded it. I am very sorry for your loss.

Know that the grieving will continue, and will be difficult. Continue to use the bike as your chapel, therapist, distraction. This certainly helped me when I lost my brother, and again this year when I lost my grandmother. The riding will help, but the pain will still linger.

Keep your memories close, and know that others are here for you.

SheFly

p.s.
Congrats on making it from coast to coast! That is a huge accomplishment, and it sounds as if your journey was truly and adventure.

[hirakukibou]

Shefly,
Thank you for your kind and insightful words. I am sorry for the loss of your grandmother as well.

The trip was bookended by the deaths of two important men in my life -- my dad and Peter. Riding does help, although it is also often a time I feel the loss most profoundly.

I know that grief comes in waves and continues for a long time. It is a process that will ease with time, but I know it takes time too.

Hira

[azfiddle]

I just read your post - just want to send a virtual hug- what a difficult time and I hope you will reach out for support from wherever it is offered, and cherish the memories of your those you have lost.

[emily_in_nc]

For awhile after I lost my dad, I cried almost every time I drove my car. I couldn't even get on my bike for about 9 months afterwards, as my dad died in a car accident and I just felt too vulnerable. Something about being alone with my thoughts while driving would bring wave after wave of grief. Later, a friend and fellow cyclist in our bike club was killed in a car accident (he was driving, not biking), and I cried several times for him while out biking. It was cathartic, but I definitely think there is something about the repetitive, almost hypnotic pace of road riding can bring grief pouring out.

I'm so sorry for your losses.

[Melalvai]

According to a recent post on the Fat Cyclist's blog, many people process emotion through physical activity.

[emily_in_nc]

According to a recent post on the Fat Cyclist's blog, many people process emotion through physical activity.

That makes sense then...guess we are not alone. Reading these reminded me that I have also cried while running. After my dad died, every time I'd get on the treadmill at the gym, I'd find myself having to hold back tears. It was very hard to hold it together -- and this was a gym at work so even more important that I not break down. I'd have been strong all morning in the office, then head to the gym at lunchtime, and emotions would come right back to the surface.