When I first started riding in 2006 at age 37, I was lucky to hook up with a rather diverse group of people, most of whom were either childless or empty nesters. Most of them were a bit (or more) older than me, but I found that I had far more in common with them in terms of interests and viewpoint than I did with people who were more my age but were in thick of raising families. Even those among the group that had young children were extremely active. If they ran or biked, their kids were with them one way or another.

I don't want to make it seem like I have anything against children or my friends with children, but there definitely came a point in my early to mid-30s where a divide developed and meeting people who did not have young children and/or who weren't married was really significant to me. I stopped feeling like this sad spinster, and I started to see a world of possibility. When I'd go out with my married with kids friends, I always ended up feeling like an alien. I'd get these uninvited "pep talks" that I'd meet someone someday. When I tried to tell them that I wasn't in some indefinite holding pattern, it was clear that they just didn't get it or didn't believe me. Now, as "luck" would have it, I ended up meeting DH through cycling and we got married after dating for about a year and a half, but I still feel rather liberated at this point that I don't view my childless life as lacking in some crucial way. I think kids are wonderful--for those who truly want to parent, but it wasn't for me.

As for being faced with the reality of growing older, I see that as somewhat liberating, too. Admittedly, aging can bring serious problems for sure, but assuming continued good health and employment, I'd like to think that DH and I are setting ourselves up for an enjoyable retirement. Many of my riding friends are now working a bit less or are fully retired. They're taking fantastic trips and really enjoying the company of their SOs, families and friends. I see it in a positive light. Plus, the older I get, the less fixated I am on the concerns of my youth. Concerns that seem really petty now. My priorities are much clearer and I have a stronger sense of the person I want to be, a sense that wasn't fully formed even just 10 years ago. I feel much more comfortable in my skin.