Thread Drift

[Amira]

I love knowing that you guys did that, after the fact. What a beautiful day it was to honor your brother's life like that.

I also plan to be cremated. Hopefully my loved-ones who are here after I pass will do something cool and meaningful like you guys have done for your brother.

I used to joke that they could scatter my ashes in the planters overlooking Neiman's shoe department, but seriously, I want to be scattered around like my brother (and in fact, in some of the same places...Tahoe and Vail among them). I figure he can come do the JDRF rides with me for years to come (I still have probably half the original container of ashes left). And, given that he had 413,660 miles on his 'super truck' when he died, I suspect he'll be cool with going to lots of different JDRF ride locations. The man did like to go places.

Talk about a surreal moment .... getting a Priority Mail box delivered to your office with ashes in it. I was taken aback at the heft of the box. My brother was so lean - imagine Lance, only about 3 inches shorter. But that box was heavy. I just kept looking at that box (through giant tears) and realizing that he HAD his priorities in the right place - I've never met anyone who lived life like my brother did. He loved what he did with a passion and he was a doer and adventurer. He left an unbelievable legacy of friends and memories and stories. He never made diddly squat monetarily, but he was the richest person I know in more important ways.

I so relate to the past few pages of posts of dealing with elderly relatives and diminished abilities, because that is my reality at the moment as well - my parents, my in-laws, my remaining aunts and uncles....and struggling through the right decisions for care, maintaining independence as long as possible and quality end of life decisions. You mourn the small losses of independence and faculties before the end, and, in the end, I expect that the loss of a parent is profound and deep, but it is a different loss entirely than that of a sibling. In our own way, we're found a way to cope and move forward (you never really get over it, though, it's something in your mind daily) and try to build something positive.

Hey, zoom-zoom, if I'm around and pedaling still, happy to have you 'ride along' on my bike one day. I hope people will do that for me, too. Think of all the great destination rides to come.

[withm]

I love this!

I used to joke that they could scatter my ashes in the planters overlooking Neiman's shoe department, but seriously, I want to be scattered around like my brother (and in fact, in some of the same places...Tahoe and Vail among them). I figure he can come do the JDRF rides with me for years to come (I still have probably half the original container of ashes left). And, given that he had 413,660 miles on his 'super truck' when he died, I suspect he'll be cool with going to lots of different JDRF ride locations. The man did like to go places.

Talk about a surreal moment .... getting a Priority Mail box delivered to your office with ashes in it. I was taken aback at the heft of the box. My brother so lean - imagine Lance, only about 3 inches shorter. But that box was heavy. I just kept looking at that box (through giant tears) and realizing that he HAD his priorities in the right place - I've never met anyone who lived life like my brother did. He loved what he did with a passion and he was a doer and adventurer. He left an unbelievable legacy of friends and memories and stories. He never made diddly squat monetarily, but he was the richest person I know in more important ways.

I so relate to the past few pages of posts of dealing with elderly relatives and diminished abilities, because that is my reality at the moment as well - my parents, my in-laws, my remaining aunts and uncles....and struggling through the right decisions for care, maintaining independence as long as possible and quality end of life decisions. You mourn the small losses of independence and faculties before the end, and, in the end, I expect that the loss of a parent is profound and deep, but it is a different loss entirely than that of a sibling. In our own way, we're found a way to cope and move forward (you never really get over it, though, it's something in your mind daily) and try to build something positive.

Hey, zoom-zoom, if I'm around and pedaling still, happy to have you 'ride along' on my bike one day. I hope people will do that for me, too. Think of all the great destination rides to come.

[zoom-zoom]

Hey, zoom-zoom, if I'm around and pedaling still, happy to have you 'ride along' on my bike one day. I hope people will do that for me, too. Think of all the great destination rides to come.

You know, I think I'm going to tell my DH that if he outlives me that I want a portion of my ashes going to anyone who will do something cool with them. I'd love to have a bit of me left in all sorts of places--places I already love and maybe places I've never been, but would have loved.

[indysteel]

Our friend's mother passed this morning. Her suffering is finally over. May she rest in
peace.

[Amira]

I hope your friend (and other family and friends) will find comfort and support as they grieve their loss. Someone told me last year that grief is a process, not an event. That is so true. I hope she leaves a wonderful legacy of love and good stories behind and am glad she is not suffering.

Our friend's mother passed this morning. Her suffering is finally over. May she rest in
peace.

[Amira]

You know, I think I'm going to tell my DH that if he outlives me that I want a portion of my ashes going to anyone who will do something cool with them. I'd love to have a bit of me left in all sorts of places--places I already love and maybe places I've never been, but would have loved.

Personally, I can't imagine doing anything else. Two different big groups of friends got together - and both groups (one in Idaho and one at Northstar at Tahoe) met at the top of the mountain for the last run of the last day of the season, talked about him, scattered his ashes and then all skied/boarded down and went out to toast him and tell stories. It dumped snow on both groups. I think he was definitely there in spirit.

I think I freaked out a poor sales clerk at the container store though. I bought probably 30 or so 4 oz. travel containers, all the same size, to send out the ashes. I guess I bought so many of them she was curious and asked me what I was going to do with them. So, I figured....well, she asked....and I told her. Not the answer she was expecting.

Even some of my friends who didn't even know my brother volunteered to take him places - that's how he got to Mt. Kilimanjaro, which I think he would have totally dug. My friend and his partner took him to the summit and videotaped it and sent it to me. So cool. Then, when they got back to base camp later, they toasted him with beers.

Finding someone I knew that was taking a scout troop to Philmont this summer was totally serendipity, but my brother loved his time at Philmont as a kid and it had a huge influence on him, so that was perfect.

He still needs to go surfing in Hawaii, though. I think I need to be the one to take him there.

Found two pictures - the color one is from Mt. Hood last summer with a bunch of his friends. We were at the top of the terrain park at Mt. Hood Summer Ski Camp. They also renamed the terrain park for him (he designed it and built most of it and was the longtime head snowboard coach there in summer). Coming from Texas, it was so mind-blowingly cool to be skiing in JUNE! The b/w one is from our private family event last July in Vail. This is about 100 yards or so down from the Gondola in an out of bounds (so appropriate for him) area, but one that my then 86-year old dad could get to. I will say the one thing we learned in Vail was be careful which way the wind is blowing when you are releasing ashes. Oops.

[redrhodie]

(((Indy))) I'm sorry for your loss. She sounded like a cool woman.

[OakLeaf]

(((((Indy & friend)))))

Wonderful ideas here for honoring loved ones' legacies.

[zoom-zoom]

So sorry, Indy. The community where I grew up is mourning the loss of a wonderful 13 year old boy who spent the last year fighting a battle with cancer. This mature-beyond-his-years child has taught people in a small community much. The world lost 2 amazing people today.

[Catrin]

((((Indy)))) so sorry for your loss. Sending thoughts and prayers to you and your friends family.