I am sorry you have to go through this, Oak. Most people just don't get it on this particular topic. And most people don't do or say anything, either. My own MIL told me my DH must "have a psychological problem" because of the stuff he told me about his childhood. OK, and you watched your husband abuse 4 kids...
One thing I know for sure, is that kids don't lie about this stuff and from my perspective in the field, abuse/neglect of any kind is the root of about 75% of all mental health issues.