That saddle looks like a torture device. I know gel saddles seem like a good idea. For trips up to the corner store, they are. For rides over 5 miles, they make everything worse. You just squirm around on the gel. Speaking as someone who started out as a heavy rider (much less so now!) I can confirm that girly bit issues are worse when you are heavier. Get a non gel saddle that is the proper width for your sit bones. When seated on the bike you should feel your weight on the bones. If your weight is on the soft bits, no saddle or pair of shorts is going to save you. Get off the saddle when you can, and I know this is draining if you are a heavier gal, but it will help restore circulation down there. If you have a bike computer set it to go off every 10 or 15 minutes to remind you to coast standing up for just a few seconds. Lastly, there is hope! As you keep riding and going in the right direction toward a healthier weight, many of the pressure issues of riding, like numb hands, burning feet, saddle sores, and burning girly bits, get much better.