[QUOTE=Irulan;644324]It sounds to me like you all haven't had a really clear conversation about money. Sure you may use your own money, but have you had the conversion where the decision was made about "I get to spend X amount of my own money on whatever I want and you don't get to comment on it ( and so do you)"? Are your mutual savings goals met? Is there debt in the family? Money is one the most common things that people do not communicate well about.[/QUOTE


I agree, money is a huge stumbling block in relationships, but we do openly discuss our finances and keep each other informed. We both have retirement accounts and pay all our (few) bills on time. As any couple with kids knows, saving is tough but we manage to do what we can. We do have those talks, and this is part of what baffles me so much about his approach to the whole new bike thing. I could understand it better if we DIDN'T talk about money, but we do. I think, since he bought my first bike as a present, he sees it as a rejection of his gift, which it is not. I don't understand why a guy would see it that way. I would say (if the positions were reversed), "hey, that's great that you have outgrown your first bike and want to move up to something better because you are improving" but I know he doesn't view it like that.
When he was younger, he raced motorcycles with his dad, so I know he has some familiarity with an "equipment-heavy" sport...not a totally new concept to him.
I feel guilty even reading reviews or looking at bikes online and I don't think that is how things should be. He is a very stubborn person and I may not be able to shift his perspective on this.