Dear So and So

[Catrin]

Maillotpois - I love your signature and am going to "steal" it if I may - not as a real signature but as a quote.

[maillotpois]

Maillotpois - I love your signature and am going to "steal" it if I may - not as a real signature but as a quote.

Thank you. It's a motto that's gotten me through many a double century and long brevet.

[Catrin]

Thank you. It's a motto that's gotten me through many a double century and long brevet.

I see it as being applicable to more than cycling, it really nails it. I did quote you on my FB page and gave you credit.

[maillotpois]

I see it as being applicable to more than cycling, it really nails it. I did quote you on my FB page and gave you credit.

Thank you. And agreed.

[bmccasland]

Dear Wasps,
Soon you will die. Yes, I'm a biologist, and know you have a functional place in the world. But I really wasn't trying to harm you, and did not appreciate you sending a soldier out to sting me. Wouldn't mind meeting firemen and paramedics again, but that wasn't the format.

So be warned, your home is going to be destroyed, chemical means will be taken.

Sincerely,
The resident that is responsible for yard maintenance

[Veronica]

Dear Male Friend of My Sister,

A stripper for my sister's birthday?! Really... that's going to make all the guys at the party uncomfortable. My family can be tacky and uncouth all on their own. They don't need the addition of a stripper. I'm sure there will be lots of raunchy comments without the stripper. Please weather gods make it super humid so I can spend all day in the water.

Veronica

[Veronica]

Dear NBC Sports,

I was very excited by how much coverage you seemed to be giving to the Olympic Swimming Trials. Alas, I've discovered it was too good to be true. You're just airing the same two hours of coverage 4 or 5 times a day.

And yes Michael Phelps is amazing, but you do know there are 1,799 other swimmers taking part in the trials? I know they're not all newsworthy, but imagine being a 14 year old in the finals for the Olympic Trials. That's a big deal. You could talk about a few other people besides Michael Phelps.

Disgruntled Swimmer

[indysteel]

Dear Male Friend of My Sister,

A stripper for my sister's birthday?! Really... that's going to make all the guys at the party uncomfortable. My family can be tacky and uncouth all on their own. They don't need the addition of a stripper. I'm sure there will be lots of raunchy comments without the stripper. Please weather gods make it super humid so I can spend all day in the water.

Veronica

Oh, that's awful. Why does ANYONE think this is ever a good idea?

For my first job out of school, I worked for a state appellate judge along with another woman who had returned to law school later in life. She was a rather proper and prim woman, and I don't necessarily mean that in a bad way. But it was abundantly clear she wasn't somebody who would ever find a stripper entertaining.

Notwithstanding that, some friends of hers hired a stripper to come to our office for her 50th birthday. Our government, judicial office. That, in itself, was awful enough. But she was so mortified by the whole thing. I couldn't even watch; it was just too painful. Our boss, bless him, stopped the "festitivies" cold and told the man he had to leave. He then got on the horn with our coworkers friends and lit into them about sending a stripper to a government office during work hours. Thank goodness somebody had some sense.

[tangentgirl]

Dear Male Friend of My Sister,

A stripper for my sister's birthday?! Really... that's going to make all the guys at the party uncomfortable. My family can be tacky and uncouth all on their own. They don't need the addition of a stripper. I'm sure there will be lots of raunchy comments without the stripper. Please weather gods make it super humid so I can spend all day in the water.

Veronica

Dear Male Friend of Veronica's Sister: Just take her to see Magic Mike. Apparently it's the Citizen Kane of stripper movies. (Does that mean the pole's name is Rosebud?) Done and done!

Dear LBS: Thanks for the amazing discount on tuneups, and thanks for being so nice. I know you are a small chain, so bigger than some of the other LBS's and able to give better discounts, but the niceness is free for everyone. So rock on, my friends, I'll be back. Well, duh, because I have to pick up the bikes, but you know what I mean.