Sahasara,
hang in there! Take the wise women's advice on pedals and saddle.
I would suggest you start focusing on your success than possible failure. You have nine miles of success and 27 years of mtb success. Conjure a pleasant memory from some of those rides.
You also might try riding in a lower pressure environment. (W/o the so, perhaps. On a bike path perhaps.) Baby steps and enjoy your progression. It will happen.