Dear university tutoring service:
Okay, how do I not meet your needs? I suspect it has something to do with the fact that I'm not eligible for work-study.
Continuing the job search with a due sense of resignation,
Me.

Dear universe:
If you could somehow point me in the direction of (legal!) part time work that would take into account my school schedule and let me finish my thesis, that would be pretty awesome. The university either wants ALL OF MY TIME, undergrads, or work-study students.